This is girl I came across on facebook, when I was adding another chick that I had met while doing day game. I saw this girl’s picture and was blown away, so sent a quick message. Some facebook messaging, texts and phone calls later and this girl has agreed to meet me to have sex.

The transcript and commentary below details how I got from me saying, “Jesus Christ you are gorgeous,” to her saying “I’m sure me pleasing myself wouldn’t feel anything like you deep inside of me. My body twisting, moaning and begging for you to force yourself deeper and not to stop.”

Note that this sort of strategy isn’t going to work with every girl and for every guy. In this case, I have a good picture up on my profile (which is VERY important for online game), and some pretty cool pictures which the girl can browse too.

Here’s how it went down.

Soul: Jesus Christ you are gorgeous. X

This is my opening line. It’s simple, direct, and used as a screener. If she responds, then she’s complying with my attempt to pick her up. If she doesn’t respond, then I can move on to someone else without wasting my time.

Jenny: LOL! THANK YOU!

Soul: You are such a tease. There are only pictures of your daughter and a cat on your facebook! Can’t believe you don’t have any more of your gorgeous self.

You daughter is so cute by the way. You look like you’re half Asian?

I’m Sri Lankan. talk to me

Jenny: Everyone in the whole world says I look Asian! I’m actualy half Caribbean half English! And my daughter is half Turkish Cypriot! My cat’s the same mix as me!

I probably shouldn’t have mentioned the Asian thing. I think it’s always best NOT to mention things that most other guys would mention or point out. I ride it out anyway.

Soul: Are you hooked up with someone? If not, you must at least have ten guys beating down your door.

I don’t normally like waiting in queues, but give me a magazine to read and I would quite happily take ticket 11!

You are so ridiculously hot it’s not even funny.

You are either a supermodel or a cat-loving spinster I reckon. Am I close?

I continue being direct so she knows I’m not a pussy and that I am going to try to get into her pants. I inject a bit of humour to lighten things up so she sees me as a fun person to talk with and doesn’t feel any pressure.

I get no response to this last message before I head out for Friday night, so I go and have a great weekend. On Monday I remember that she never got back to me, so I chase her a little.

Soul: Jenny, you are too hot to be acting so aloof.

How was your day?

Jenny: It was good good. How about you? How funny!

She’s complied by responding. I’ve already shown her my confident and funny sides, so now I tell her a bit more about myself to build comfort – this way she’s knows I’m not just a dick on legs and can actually rationalise her attraction to me, which she’ll need to do if she is going to meet up with me.

Soul: It was interesting. My whole life is in flux at the moment as I’m trying to figure out where to take my career - do I take the plunge, quit my job and become the serial entrepeneur that I know I am capable of being, or do I work my 9-5 for a few more months.

What do you do with yourself darling, besides looking absolutely gorgeous at all times (if I was you I would look in the mirror and wink seductively at myself all day)? x

Jenny: You seize the opportunities that arise with both hands. I just broke up with my daughter’s dad so I’m trying to sort my life out!

Here’s a good opportunity to be empathetic, and also to qualify her on being a good mother, something which is bound to resonate deeply with her.

Soul: How long ago? I’m so sorry darling, that must be really rough. How long were you guys together?

Your daughter really is cute by the way, and I’ve a suspicion you’re a great mother.

Well I don’t know how much better I can make you feel over facebook, so let’s change the topic. What do you in your spare time, you know for fun?

PS: if the answer is “I have a young daughter, I don’t have fun anymore!!” then tell me about what you used to do for fun!

Jenny: Five years together. I’m a party animal! Just turned! You?

Here I give a very broad answer that shows a range of value across different areas. I don’t go into too much detail, as I want to see what she picks up on so I can figure out how to best build a connection with her.

Soul: Five years, damn. I’m sure you’re gonna be fine sweetie - everything will work itself out.

I party, I play, I work, I dance, I talk, I charm.

What sort of places do you party at?

Jenny: Anywhere with music and alcohol, baby! What do you do?

At this point it’s clear that she’s invested in the interaction as she’s responding to my messages and asking questions back. There’s no point staying in the same medium (facebook); this is a classic point where I need to escalate things to a higher degree of interaction.

Soul: Why are we sending a million messages back and forth?? I think we should take this interaction to the next level - text.

What’s your number darling? I’m going to text you when I’m out partying tonight

Jenny: Text is good! 07XXX XXX XXX

Rather than text her later as suggested and as she expected, I immediately call her – my phone game is solid and I know I can charm her and keep her thinking about me for a while with a quick 5 minute phone call. I call her, make her laugh, talk a bit, and then get ready to go out.

A few days pass. In this time. I try to arrange a meeting with her, and we loosely fix an outing with her mates for Friday night. On Friday she cancels due to her friends flaking. I had a backup anyway, as I never felt it was fixed securely. On Saturday night, I’m exhausted and come home early. I remember Jenny and send her a text to see if she’s up…

Soul: What are you up to right now darling? X

She responds and we start chat on the phone for about twenty minutes. Speaking to a girl late in the night is always good – their emotions are much more pliable when they’re alone in bed and you can normally raise the sexuality level very easily. I make her laugh and smile, lower the tone and pace of my voice and put a hint of directness in everything I say. I don’t get too explicit yet as I’m still calibrating as to how fast to escalate with her.

After our chat, I send her a text so that she has something tangible to anchor all the good feelings I just stimulated in her to…

Soul: Big goodnight kiss for you darling. I like you sleep tight x

Jenny: Thank you! I like you too honey. I’ll give you lots of goodnight kisses xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx (I gave you 17 kisses because that’s my lucky number)

Soul: Stop it, you’re making me smile! Haha, you know I haven’t had a Saturday night in in ages, but it feels so good. I’m gonna give you more kisses back and stroke your cheeks. X

Here I’m trying to escalate things further. If she’s responsive then I will keep on escalating until we get to the sexual tipping point or she stops complying.

Jenny: Well I haven’t had a Saturday night in since last Saturday! I’m glad I make you smile. That’s my aim in life, to be a clown! I’m going to give you more kisses, stroke your cheeks and run my hand down your stomach…

Soul: Darling, you are making me want to run my hand through your hair and kiss you passionately. And then turn you round and kiss the back of your neck- you are too sweet.

Jenny: MIAOW! Taking the bull by the horns are we?! I think you’re hot! I love your face. I saw your muscles- so sexy. Your arms are so huge. I like your skin colour too. Has your ego been massaged enough? Oh and I LOVE your voice. It’s super sexy.

It would be too obvious at this point to give a super sexual escalation response, so I pull it back and bring the comfort levels up again – my overall concern here is NOT to just be a guy she thinks about when she’s horny, but also a guy she can imagine spending time with when she’s not.

Soul: You know what I love about you? How open and honest you are, I’m just the same. Really want to cuddle up with you, chat and fall alseep right now. So tired! x

Jenny: I think my honesty and my openness are my biggest flaws. I’m tired too. Would love a snuggle on those arms. I’d probably want a bit more too though

Soul: Honey, if I wasn’t so tired and needed sleep, I would get in a taxi right now amd give you exactly what you needed. Til then, I’ll just imagine it x

Jenny: Well you’re free to imagine what you want. I give you permission to explore my whole body I’m going to bed now though cos I need sleep too. Will text tomorrow if you want. X

The night passes.

Soul: Darling it’s morning and I’m still thinking about you. Wish you were here so I could slide in between your legs and fuck you all morning long… xxx

Jenny: What a text to wake up to! Have I created a monster? You’re a tiger.

Soul: Hehe, good morning kisses for you. hope you had a good sleep?I feel so much more rested now. Gonna have a good breakfast too x

Jenny: I’m so relaxed I’m finding it hard to move. Glad you feel refreshed. What are you having for breakfast other than fantasies of what we could be doing together?!

There’s a two hour break in our texting when one of my girls comes over for breakfast and sex. After she leaves, Jenny and I continue texting all day. I run some standard comfort stuff – again, all in the interests of preventing flaking – and also spike sexuality levels by being direct and describing sexual things we are going to do together, e.g. eat ice cream off each other.

I try to arrange a meet up, but between her trying to find a babysitter and me travelling to Las Vegas for the next week it has to wait until I get back. I’m aware that I need to keep myself in the forefront of her mind as I leave, so that even if she hooks up with someone else in the interim, she still wants me when I get back.

The next day at work I am horny as fuck thinking about her and send her a text…

Soul: Baby, I wanna bounce you up and down on my dick and then bend you over my desk at work – so I can fuck you senseless while we both enjoy the view over London. X

Jenny: How can you be having these thoughts when you should be working. That body, firm and toned between my legs, I’m going to explode before we meet! I’ll make sure I have ice cream but you have to bring protection because I’m a lady and would never buy those things!

This is so on.

Soul: Sounds like a plan darling. So confirmed a) I’m seein you Friday XXth, b) You’re sending me pictures so I can shoot my load over thoughts of you in the meantime. Xxx Mwah

Jenny: Absolutely x

I message her while I’m in Vegas, get on the phone to her as soon as I’m back, push forward the meeting, and seal the deal a day earlier than planned.

We’ve all been there. You start flirting with a women and she’s hot and bothered for you, but then out of the blue she won’t answer your phone calls. Where did you go wrong? Did you say something stupid? Did you send the wrong text? Or did you not know what to say in the first place?

There’s a strong reason why women are attracted to George Clooney and Brad Pitt. Besides the way they look, it’s the way they walk, talk, look at women and the final thing is they’ve unlocked the Good Dog / Bad Dog theory.

Woman want to be your dirty nasty bad girl! The only way to do this is to unlock her inner bad girl. You have to start to think about the dynamic of how women think in order to unlock their inner bad girl. To unlock a woman’s inner bad girl, you need to make it a safe place for her to unlock the dirty side of her mind.

Most men do not understand this dynamic, and when they talk about sex they talk about it in raw terms. For instance, a man will say “I want to have sex with you right now.” A woman hears “All you care about is getting off, and you don’t care about my pleasure.” Or, a man will say “I’m feeling so horny today that I’m about to explode!” A woman hearing this will think “Well, why don’t you just jerk off then since there’s nothing in it for me!”

These are some of the reasons that flirtatious beginnings crash when they’re about to take off. Men need to realize that women are wired inside their mind. Deep sexual seduction starts inside a woman’s mind- not inside her groin. For a second, think inside your mind, and think what you feel like when you meet someone new. Here’s the obvious things. You’re attracted to her body. You’re attracted to her face. You anticipate seeing her for the very first time. You have similar interests.

Now let’s say you’ve gone out with her one or two times and you’ve made out with her, but you haven’t done anything deeper. You think you’re doing all the right things, but what you’re forgetting about is turning on the switch inside her mind that creates and lets go of her dirty girl! Now, most men think about the obvious things- they get lost inside the obvious things. They think like a man! They think about sex, and they have a desperate energy about them. All they are thinking about is getting the woman back to their place so they can try to have sex with her.

A woman in this situation who initially felt a connection, will immediately in her mind switch from a feeling of excitement to one of caution. They put the brakes on in their head and they look for things to go wrong- and a man not knowing this will actually play right into that. I call this ‘The Scared Puppy Disease’ Women feel all sorts of things. The problem is that you’re pushing them too much into the sexual tone, instead of allowing them to embrace their inner dirty girl.

Let me give you a couple examples – they will think these things:

1. “I like him, but I felt this way before and it did not work out.”

2. “Does he feel the same way as me? Is he having the same connection as me emotionally, or is he just looking to get laid, because he is talking about sex a little too much.”

All this leads to them taking a jab at you to protect them from falling for you if you’re the wrong guy. For instance, they will say something to you like “Are you just looking to have sex, or are you trying to get to know me?” Or they’ll say “I’m not looking for just sex. I’m looking for someone to connect with emotionally.” This is what I call ‘The Very Scared Puppy Disease’.

So what do you do in this situation? Most men will get defensive and they’ll say “I’m not looking just for sex. I want to meet somebody great!” In that situation a woman hears “He’s just looking for sex ’cause he got defensive.” Women hear things differently from men. You need to learn how to ’speak woman’.

One way to do this is to read between the lines and lob in a “good girl” at her. Just like a puppy, women need praise to keep going. So if she gets defensive in an email, instead of you defending yourself back, you need to validate what she’s telling you in a very simple way: Tell her that you’re really enjoying connecting with her. That’s it! That’s what she’ll hear. Hearing these simple words of praise and reassurance from you will continue the intense flirting, and they will allow her to feel good about her decision and her feelings of a dirty sexual nature. This is called “The Good Girl Praise.” Women live in fear of being hurt, and as the men it’s your job to encourage her. Encourage her to be the sexual being that she so desires!

If it walks like a duck, and it talks like a duck, than it probably is a duck.

Makes sense right? Well this idea applies hugely to pick-up – allow me to explain.

Have you ever noticed that it’s hard to be unhappy when you smile? Or that you immediately feel looser the instant you take that first sip of your cocktail? What’s happening here is that you’re associating these behaviors with the way you typically feel when engaging them. Your mind is backwards rationalizing – saying “oh, I’m smiling, I smile when I’m happy, therefore I must be happy” or “ah, I’m drinking a cocktail, I’m looser and more relaxed when I drink, therefore I’ll loosen up and relax”.

Well, between our natural instincts and our societal preprogramming, both males and females have similar triggers with regards to feeling attraction and wanting sex. Take for instance a male talking to an attractive female. Odds are he’s going to try to:

1) Establish commonalities with her. Most likely this will take the form of asking a ton of mundane questions until he hits one he can relate to, i.e. “what kind of music do you like? … Oh cool! I love Pearl Jam”.

2) Qualify himself to her. In the beginning he’ll talk about his job, how he makes good money and lives a fun lifestyle. He’ll also avoid disagreement at all costs and even hedge previous statements. For instance:

Guy: I love hamburgers.
Girl: Oh, I’m a vegetarian.
Guy: Oh really? I’ve been wanting to do that. I’m trying to eat healthy so I’ve slowly been cutting meat out of my diet.

3) Establish physical closeness or contact. Depending on how socially competent he is, the degree to which he does this will vary.

So then, in a given interaction, if you see these 3 things taking place it’s a safe bet to assume the guy is seeking to align with the girl who he perceives as having high value – most likely her attractiveness and sex value.

Interestingly enough, girls do the same things with a few minor twists.

For instance, rather than telling about their professional accomplishments, a girl will tell a man she likes about how she loves to cook, went to the gym, or is ‘a cool, drama-free girl’ – basically obvious things girls perceive as being valuable to guys.

So then, in a pick-up something of immense importance is getting the girl to “walk like a duck” – getting her to exhibit the same behaviors she would when trying to attract a guy she really likes. If you can make it LOOK and FEEL like she’s the one chatting you up, you’re creating a self-fulfilling prophecy and greatly increasing your chances of closing.

So then, what are some of these behaviors?

Physical positioning

When a girl flirts with a guy she likes, he’s usually the relaxed ‘anchored’ one and she’s the one “talking in”. Meaning, he’s leaning against the wall while she’s standing facing him. Or he’s reclined and she’s sitting next to him with her legs turned towards him. Well, this can be pretty easily simulated by making sure that you are at all times at least as physically comfortable as the girl, if not more so. This means, if she’s standing, you’re leaning against something. If she’s leaning, you’re sitting. And if she’s sitting, you’re reclining. When you open, as you stand “on the outside” your value drops, you need to create the visual effect that she’s the one chatting to you ASAP. Usually you can just grab her by her arms, and move her a few feet so that you’re leaning against the bar/wall and she’s facing you.

It’s impossible to list out all the logistic ways this applies, but bottom line it should look like she’s hitting on you.

Also, have you ever noticed when you really spike a girl’s attraction, her head tilts down and her eyes look up at you? Again, you can easily simulate this by simply keeping your head positioned above hers – certainly don’t feel like you need to engage her at eye level.

Another cool little thing- sometimes girls go into these little rant-like monologues. When they do, try letting your eyes wander around the room like you’re losing interest just like girls do when guys start telling them about their job. It will look to everyone there like she’s trying to impress you with some story and you’re less than interested; she’ll pick up on this as well after all, it’s the same thing she does when chodes start qualifying to her.

Dialogue

When girls flirt with guys, they A) seek rapport via asking questions. B) Seek to highlight commonalities. C) Talk about the traits that they think the man will value. With a little bit of conversational savvy, you can pretty easily get the girl harping on all 3 of these. Firstly, don’t ask lame questions. The time to exchange life details (job, residence, etc) will come – don’t be the one to initiate it. Also, when she asks you questions, prolong the sequence by giving less forthcoming than she’d expect. Example:

Her: Where are you from?
You: Give it a guess.
Her: Umm, Los Angeles?
You: Haha, terrible guess!
Her: Hahahha, I don’t know! Where?
You: Haha, no worries, I’m from the East Coast. Have you spent much time in Europe?
Her: Yeah, I was in Italy last spring – wait a minute – where on the East Coast?
You: Oh awesome, I grew up in New York, how long were you there for?

So, above we have a totally natural sequence of dialogue, which even if the girl isn’t interested in the guy she’ll still go along with. At the same time though, the way she is almost forced to prod for the exact location is identical to the way she’d prod a guy she really likes for information.

With regards to B) getting her to highlight commonalities, this can also be verbally orchestrated. For example:

You: I love ice cream, how about you?
Her: Oh me too.
You: Cool, I like mint chocolate chip, what’s your favorite flavor?
Her: I like strawberry.
You: Oh man, those two are like polar opposites, haha, I bet we have complete different taste in food.
Her: No they’re not, they’re both sweet and they are both ice cream. Besides, I don’t always eat strawberry, I like mint chocolate chip too.

Ok, so ice cream is a lame example, but fact is, as a hot girl who’s not yet attracted to you she’s not likely to initiate seeking a commonality with you. So what you did is created a commonality (everyone loves ice cream), then took it away (different flavors). Her natural reaction is going to be to re-create that connection by convincing you of the commonality. Just like she would used to try to convince the captain of the football team they liked the same music.

Physical Contact/Kino

Girls are very touchy/feely with guys they like. Again, this can be simulated. We’re all familiar with The Almighty Claw, in all it’s glory. When you claw (arm around shoulder), what does it look like? It looks like you’re a confident guy who’s comfortable with physical contact and also feels a closeness with the girl. This is a great start, but take it one step further – next time you claw, reach behind your own back and guide her to put her arm around your waist. Now you look like a couple…you’re “together”.

Don’t be shy about guiding her to reciprocate kino – if they’re ok with you’re touching them, they’ll most often be fine with touching you in the same way.

We all know what female-to-male attraction looks like- heck we’re bombarded with it everyday in mainstream media. So next time you’re interacting with a girl, think about how things would “look” to an outsider, and align as much of that as you can with how it would look if she were desperately trying to flirt with you. Physical positioning, dialogue, and kino are just a few easily adjusted elements that can greatly change the appearance of an interaction and trigger in her mind “Well, I’m leaning into him, trying to create commonalities, and touching him- I must really like him”.

Ever just know that a woman is into you? To the point where you know you can sleep with her if you play your cards right? And ever just fuck up at some point, crash and burn?

What happened, is that you didn’t respect The Power Play. What is a Power Play? It’s when a woman is at a heightened emotion state, whether it be really happy, sad, mad, sexual, or whatever. Or when there is a general window of opportunity (i.e. the two of you are alone by coincidence).

When she is in this heightened emotional or coincidental state, is the point when she is most likely to leave or sleep with you.

Many men miss out on this opportunity, because they simply don’t understand its importance, and ignore it until it’s too late. The point when she goes back into a neutral state of mind.

Jeepers Creepers: “I like Gummi Bears! I have four different colored Gummi Bears. Choose one and I’ll tell you a secret about yourself. There’s a red one, a blue one…”

Sigh. At least he’s catching on to commonalities. Why don’t I like bouncing around? I have found that in many of my one-night stands, by initiating a Power Play, there was no need for me to go anywhere other than a place to have sex.

And when you bounce around, you allow for numerous interruptions to occur. She could grow tired, a friend could call, she could get sick, etc. In short, bouncing around does not work to your advantage.

Now, let’s move on to the types of Power Plays. And remember, we do not wait until the end of the night, we initiate a Power Play when she is at a heightened emotional state, whether it’s at the end of the night or not.

The Verbal Power Play

The Verbal Power Play is the Power Play you use to go to the place where you’re going to have sex. Now, if you’ve been following this guide, then you have commonalities that you’ve been focusing on.

Let’s look at an example of a Verbal Power Play in which our connection is that we both have a dog:

Assanova: “Yeah, my dog is crazy! He likes to run into walls, I swear! I have no clue why he does it!”

Girl: “Hahahaha! That’s funny!”

Assanova: “He’s so retarded! Let’s go visit him and
see if he does it!”

Girl: “Ok! Let me tell my friends that I’m leaving.”

Three things in this. One, I’m not waiting until the end of the night. I’m leaving while she is at an emotional high. Two, I’m controlling her emotional state by making it sound exciting. And three, it’s a legit excuse for her to leave with me. Thus, she does not look slutty.

Now let’s look at the opposite end of the spectrum:

Girl: “This bar is really dull. I’m getting bored.”

Assanova: “Yeah, it is boring. I wanna see those pictures of you with Peewee Herman that you keep talking about. Let’s go check them out.”

Girl: “You’re going to feel so stupid when you see that I wasn’t lying.”

Assanova: “Yeah, we’ll see.”

Again, she doesn’t look slutty. And again, I’m using the topic of our connection as the reason to leave. She is at a saddened emotional state and I’m acting on it. If she becomes neutral again, she might want to stay at the bar, so that’s the reasoning for acting quickly.

In one instance, that actually happened. I left with a girl from a party within ten minutes. The interaction went something like this. I walk into a room upstairs:

Girl: “You look like you smoke weed!”

Assanova: “Yup. Wanna go smoke a blunt at my place?”

Girl: “Yeah.”

She spent most of the time telling her friends that she was leaving. Our actual interaction was that fast. How do I know this? I came with a group of friends, and before all of them even made their way inside of the house, I was walking out with this girl. I didn’t wait around; I took advantage of her heightened emotional state.

One crucial part of the Power Play is that you must act as if it’s perfectly normal. If you seem too eager, she will instantly back out. However, if it seems like normal behavior from you, she will have no problem leaving with you.

And most importantly, you must assume that she will say yes. When some men leave with women, they’ll actually fuck up their own game by doubting themselves.

For instance, instead of going to the bedroom and just going with the flow, they’ll say something dumb like:

Jeepers Creepers: “I’m going to spend the night. Where’s your bed at?”

Girl: “Umm, you’re not staying here. My roommates will be home soon.”

At least he made it this far. However, he’d probably be fucking her right now if he would have just shut up, and took things one step at a time.

The Physical Power Play

I was asked about “kino” or when to touch a woman. My answer? I don’t touch her until she touches me. But what happens if she doesn’t touch me? What now?

This is no different than the Verbal Power Play. If I catch her at a heightened emotional state, I go in. This has happened several times at bars. Guys kept asking me how I was making out with women so fast, because they couldn’t figure it out. An example might go like this:

Assanova: “I wanna kiss you.”

Her emotional state is obviously that of shock, and I go in for the kiss. In essence, it was a matter of shocking her first, heightening her emotional state. Had I just walked up to her, grabbed her, and tried to kiss her, she would have pulled away her face before I even got close.

It’s ‘place her in the heightened emotional state, and then proceed’, not the other way around. Remember that. The same goes for when you’re in the bedroom.

Most of my one-night stands go a little something like this, in the place where sex will take place:

1) Focus on our commonalities.

2) Slow down the speed of my voice, thus placing her in a heightened sexual state.

3) And since I am the dominant personality, she subconsciously matches my sexual state by lowering and slowing down her voice.

4) I kiss her. We fuck.

I’m not going to cover last minute resistance, because if you’ve been following this guide, it shouldn’t happen. The solution is to just back off. If nothing is seriously wrong, then she’ll come after you.

Jeepers Creepers: “You mean I can get laid without the
use of painfully memorizing routines from my routine
book?”

Yes, Jeepers Creepers, it really is that simple.

Sexual tension is the feeling created when two people mutually desire to escalate beyond self-perceived standards of what is ’socially proper’. ‘Socially proper’ escalation standards are defined both internally (our ideals, usually instilled in us by our parents/friends/bible…) and externally (can’t shag in a restaurant, with people watching, etc.).

It can be as de-escalated as both sides feeling they can’t/shouldn’t flirt (perhaps because they work together), or as escalated as both sides doing everything but having sex though they want to (perhaps she’s on her period).

Let’s take an example. Suppose you and a girl at church are attracted to each other. Sitting in the pews on a crowded Sunday you brush your knuckle against her outer thigh, you both know you can’t escalate further even though you’d like to (definately not socially-proper given where you are). Result: crazy build-up of sexual tension.

So then - if that’s what sexual tension IS, let’s talk about how we can use it.

Think of sexual tension like a rubber band being pulled by two sides (ideas about what is socially proper, and a mutual desire to escalate). If the tension increases to a certain point, the rubber band will snap and fly in off one of two directions - one direction being triggering ASD, the other direction being a BJ in the bathroom.

When trying to bed a girl, we can do one of two things…

1) We calibrate our pace and manner of escalation in such a way that that the constraints of what is ’socially proper’ do not arise, rather you recognize them before they become an issue and you work around them- the ‘rubber band’ is at ease - we call this being ’smooth’.

or

2) You yank the fucking rubber band so hard that it’s certain to fly in the direction you want - in other words, you and the girl mutually agree (spoken or unspoken) to smash through ’social standards’ and say “fuck what people think, lets do what feels good.”

Both methods have a time and a place - the first method however does not really have much sexual tension involved, so we’ll focus on the 2nd.

So then, the idea is that rather than trying to hide from it - you embrace what is taboo and indulge in your primal urges. How can we facilitate this? How can we “yank the shit out of the rubber-band”?

Well, my favorite way of doing this is by creating a false social restriction then smashing through it. So for instance, suppose I gauge that the girl has no qualms about kissing on day1, but doesn’t think it’s ok to give a bj on day1. I’ll create a false social restriction about kissing…let the tension build (we both want to kiss each other but can’t)- then ‘yank the band’/snap the tension by saying ‘fuck it’ and kissing her passionately.

More explicitly, this looks like- when I can tell she’s near-ready to be kissed, I’ll whisper something in her ear like “man, oh man…i so want to kiss you right now…but not with your friends watching.” A few minutes later I may grab her by her arse, pull her against me, and whisper to her “this is driving me crazy, I really want to kiss you, but kissing in a bar is poor form”. From here there’s crazy high sexual tension so she’ll either agree with what I’ve said or if she’s bold she’ll say “who cares”. Either way, I’ll kiss her HARD, then look at her devilishly, knowing we saw the line and crossed it anyway.

And from here on out - we’re already over the line, so we may as well keep going and see where it leads.

In short, the model is (assuming she’s already attracted and compliant with your escalation)

1) Create social constraints impending relatively minor escalation (or acknowledge already existing constraints) - (thus sexual tension is built)
2) Blatantly cross the minor social constraints (easy enough…you created them in the first place!)
3) Since you’re already over the line, you may as well venture further. The sky is the limit.

One of the most frustrating things about being down in Australia was how the women seem to ask these polite questions, such as “Where are you from?” - but they’re just being polite, rather than showing interest, like it would indicate in the US.

To deal with this, Captain Jack and I decided to start framing those questions as mundane and boring early on, so we don’t have to disappear down ‘question ladders’ that don’t lead to comfort. We’ve been saying something like:

“You know, I like Australian girls, but it seems like they just ask a bunch of superficial questions. And it’s not that I want to avoid those, it’s just that that’s not the way I like to get to know people. I think there are like three different levels people get to know each other at, but if you just stick to the surface level, you’ll know people, but never actually get to really know them”

It’s been working wonders. So much so that it got us thinking about using more framing, and in more situations.

Something I noticed a while ago, and have been teaching for a while, is: women have much more pliable frames than guys. If you treat a woman like she’s your girlfriend, she’ll act like that. If you treat her like you’re courting her, she’ll hold off before having sex with you. If you treat her like she’s looking to get fucked in the ass in the bathroom … she’ll often act in to that frame too.

We’ve been experimenting with setting sexual frames as early on as possible - framing everything girls do as trying to get us in to bed. The last few nights, I’ve had EVERY girl agree and act accordingly … so there are definitely some interesting results to be had.

Future has a concept he calls prepping, and it’s generally used in phone and text game. You prep a girl to your physical advances so you don’t have those weird moments of awkwardness when you don’t know how expectant of kino she’s going to be. So you can prep by saying something like: “I’m going to try and kiss you” before you kiss her, and there’s no shocking or awkward moment when you actually do. When I got laid a couple of nights ago here, I prepped the girl by telling her I was trying to get in her pants.

My internal pickup simulator (and a fair amount of experience now) tells me that the combination of prepping and framing along with a jealousy plotline is the best and most effective way to get same night lays.

Captain Jack and I are probably the best guys out there at same night lays at the moment, and we’re both convinced this new system of pumping buying temperature while framing her as overtly sexual, and then doing a take-away at the highest possible buying tempreature, and introducing a passive jealousy plotline, and then returning and prepping her for escalation seems to be the new best model for same night lays.

Have you ever been on a date but didn’t know how to get her back to your house?

A student of mine was on a first date with an attractive young lady and wanted to get her back to his place for some mutual fun. So, without knowing exactly how to present his desire to her, and being horny as hell, he dives head first into a river of rejection. The conversation after dinner goes something like this:

Him: “So… Wanna go back to my place?”
Her: “No, I don’t think so. I don’t kiss guys on the first date, much less sleep with them.”
Him: “No, No, No! I wasn’t thinking that…. I wanted… to umm… show you my stamp collection!”

Her: “Ha! Sure you do! Let’s just save that for another time.”

Him: “How about just for a little bit? I can make us some coffee.”

Her: “No thanks. We should leave soon. I need to get up early.”

Him: “Are you sure? My coffee is really good. I also have some ice cream at the house.”

Her: “No I really can’t. Thanks, but I should go. But I did have a wonderful time with you.”

Does this sound familiar? What’s wrong with this picture? Is it because she doesn’t like coffee, or is it because she doesn’t eat ice cream? It can’t be the stamp collection, can it?

I have to give my student credit. He definitely gets an “A” for persistence. That dude has no shame! Even being called out on his phony agenda, he still tries to get her back to his place. He’s practically groveling for her to come over. Getting “no” for an answer is definitely not a good way to start the relationship. The desperation in his approach was a major part of what turned her off about his proposition. If he were to put on a plaid suit and offer her no-interest financing, he would have a better chance at selling her a used car than getting her home.

Without a solid game plan and smooth execution, you may have to join my student in a threesome with Rosie Palmer and her 5 sisters! I don’t like getting blue balls, and I’m sure you don’t either!

The advice I gave to my student required much more than an email response. I had to call him personally and give him the “Come to Jesus” talk. This is what I advised him to do.

Before you even think about asking her to come home with you (a concept I like to refer to as “extraction”), there are important questions you need to find out first.

“Does she have to get up early tomorrow?”

If she has to get up for work at the crack of dawn, she’s probably not going to want to stay up late. No matter how much she likes you, or how well the evening is going, she’s probably not willing to risk her job to come home with you. Finding out the answer to this crucial question will prevent you from being shot down when you ask her back to your place.

“How did she get here?”

Did she drive her car or take the subway? The transportation issue is critical, so that you know exactly how to get her back to your place. If the last train to her house leaves at 10:00, it’s unlikely you’ll get her to go with you. If she came in her car, she could easily realize how tired she is when following you home and change her mind. If this is the case, you might suggest leaving your car there and going together in her car. This will prevent her from backing out, and you can get one of your buddies to pick your car up tomorrow.

“Who did she come with?”

If you met her at a bar, then this question is an important one. You need to find out who her friends are and make friends with them. Win them over and show them you can be trusted. If they don’t know you, they aren’t going to let you take her home.

“Who does she live with?”

This is an important question if you can’t bring her back to your place. Going to her place will add a challenge to the equation, since you don’t have as much control over the logistics as you would at your own place. You may have to win over roommates and pets, so it is essential that you be prepared for that as well.

“How far away do you live?”

If she lives clear across town, it’s going to be a challenge to get her to come home with you. If this is the case, you’re going to have to plan accordingly. If you’ve done the math and find that the logistics are not in your favor, it’s better to save face and prevent being shot down. Logistics is the key to getting laid.

So now that you got logistics out of the way, what’s next? Want to know how to smoothly invite her back to your place?

Having a solid game plan will give you solid confidence when you invite her home. Notice how I use the word “invite” instead of ask or beg. The secret of securing her attraction to you is to NEVER come off as desperate or needy. This is a huge turn off to women. Besides, inviting her will make her feel like it was her decision.

True seducers create opportunities and encourage women to take them.

Open the door assuming she will walk in. If she doesn’t, don’t be fazed. Being nonchalant and laid back might be all the encouragement she needs. Make it seem like you’re doing her a favor, and if she doesn’t accept the invitation then she is really missing out.

How do I use the extraction method effectively?

Learn about the things she is interested in. What excites her? Use your knowledge of these things as information to get her back to your place.
For example, if she is passionate about wine, tell her about the fantastic bottle of wine you have waiting at your house. Give her the idea of sharing the bottle with her. Upsell the wine and get her to open the door and walk in herself.

“Even people who don’t drink wine like this brand. And for the ones who do fall in love with it, it’s really amazing!”

Adding some intriguing marketing can help spike her curiosity. You could easily say,

“You know what, I’m feeling spontaneous! I’m having a great time with you. Let’s continue this conversation with some of that wine.”

How did you create the opportunity?

• You found out what her passions are.
• You bait her with something she is passionate about.
• You upsell the bait.
• You went in for the kill.

You also confirmed that she doesn’t have to get up early with your logistical questions you asked earlier, and she has nothing better to do, so why not enjoy some amazing wine and company?

The ultimate secret seducers use to get laid.

Get lucky! Luck = preparation meeting opportunity. The more prepared you are, the luckier you get. That’s why guys say “I got lucky” when they get laid. If you keep relying on luck alone to get laid, you’ll be having more blue balls than sex. Make your own luck and have the ultimate control over your sex life.

While the clitoris is the only anatomical organ whose sole function is sexual pleasure, men still have trouble understanding that women are designed to enjoy sex more than them. Have you ever described an orgasm as “waves of pleasure, crashing through your whole body”? No. Have you ever been unable to walk after having sex? No. Your puny foreskin is really no competition to the massive combined sexual potential of the g-spot and clitoris.

But men are always framed as the sexual aggressor. Men are always portrayed as the promiscuous sex. The result? Men start to believe that women don’t want sex as much as they do.

Here’s the thing: women love sex, but they absolutely hate feeling bad about having had sex. And society’s been telling them since time began that casual sex is wrong.

From an evolutionary perspective, having casual sex is a pretty big gamble for her, in the same way that approaching strange women is for men. Where you get ‘approach anxiety’ - fear of approaching a woman for the first time - she gets ‘last minute resistance’ - fear of having sex with a new guy for the first time.

‘Last Minute Resistance’ isn’t the same as not wanting to have sex with you - it’s just a natural feeling of nervousness she gets before doing it. The simple way around this is spending more time with a girl, getting to know her better, and sharing an emotional connection with her.

The difficult part? Making sure you don’t lose sexual attraction as you do this.

The Big Mistake

Different girls require different amount of comfort and connection before they’re going to feel comfortable sleeping with you. A girl whose already comfortable with her sexuality isn’t going to need to feel like your soul mate - as long as she feels safe (emotionally and physically) around you, you’re going to be fine.

More sexually inhibited girls are a bit harder to put at ease. And here’s where many guys make a big mistake. They try and build lots of comfort and connection with a girl without also building and maintaining sexual attraction. Result? They end up in the friend zone, or they end up falling for the girl themselves.

The solution is ‘fractionation’ and ‘releases’. You have to make sure you’re interspersing heavy emotional moments with light-hearted banter and teasing. After you’ve told her the story about what those cute little raccoons taught you about love when you were 6 years old, tease her and push her away by saying “and you know that’s why we’d never work out, right?” with a smile. Build up little barriers - stupid reasons why you can’t ever be together - and play against those in order to make her feel comfortable building a connection with you.

Remember, you’re trying to make her feel comfortable and emotionally about you, about having sex with you, about the situation you’re in, and about making a decision to sleep with you. You need to demonstrate to her that you’re not judgmental, and you need to let her feel she’s in control of the situation and not being pressurized.

But don’t turn in to a total wuss - you want to be lovers, not friends!

Everyone knows the classic “kiss-close”, right? You say to the girl “Would you like to kiss me?”, and then:

• If she says yes, you kiss her
• If she says no, you say “I didn’t say you could, you just looked like you had something on your mind“
• If she says maybe, you kiss her

Some students have trouble seeing why maybe is the same as yes in this case.So we’re going to cover here what my friend Sheriff calls the “Gay Bar” Test, that you can use to tell if any behaviour a girl display is a sign of interest or not. In these situations, ask yourself: “If I was in a gay bar, and a man came up to me, and did what I’ve just done, would I do what she’s doing?”

eg: If you were in a gay bar, and a guy said: “Would you like to kiss me?”would you say anything other than NO? If you were in a gay bar and a man put your hand on his leg, would you leave it there? If you do ever go to a gay bar, one of the first things you’ll learn: if you make eye contact with guys, they’ll see it as an invitation to come and talk to you, which you probably want to avoid. Exactly the same experience women have in normal clubs. If you’re getting sustained eye contact in a club, from a chick, therefore, she’s definitely interested.

[digg-reddit-me]Last week’s article on Bill ‘The Pimp’ Clinton garnered a whole range of responses. The underlying theme? As “pimpin’” as Billy-boy may be, he’s still married to Hillary Clinton. No-one rushed to describe Ms Lewinsky as their perfect date either, for that matter.

In that article, however, we did promise what we referred to as “a story of wonder and hope involving a short Hungarian man and his quest to bed all of France’s ageing super-models”.

We won’t quite go that far, but Mr Carla Bruni, aka Nicolas Sarkozy (aka The President of France) certainly qualifies in our books as a ladies man. First there was the beautiful former-model Cécilia Ciganer-Albéniz, and now, of course, the quite lovely Carla Bruni.

Sarkozy himself’s no looker, and he tops out at just 5′4. He’s wealthy, but he’s not loaded. So what’s our man offering that’s getting the lovely Ms Bruni biting?

Be Famous and Powerful

France may no longer be the Napoleonic empire-building military colossus it once was, but there’s not many countries that can tell the US to go fuck themselves, and find the worst repurcussion is a change in how they refer to ‘French Fries’ on Capitol Hill.

With Sarkozy as both Glorious Leader of La République, and getting the title of Prince of Andorra that that confers on him (no kidding), he’s pretty high up on the power and status ladders.

“Kissinger told us that power is the ultimate aphrodisiac”, says dating coach Adam Lyons, “and while he’s right, you don’t have to be President or rich to use this to your advantage. Two years ago I decided I didn’t want to be chasing women anymore, I wanted them chasing me. So I went out and started meeting lots of new people, and introducing them all to each other. It created an instant buzz - everyone knew who I was, people were talking about me, and I started getting contacted by night clubs who wanted me to bring crowds. I knew I’d made it when this stunning blonde came up to me on a night out, and told me she’d been trying to meet me for weeks.”

Get Over Your Past

“What made me who I am now is the sum of all the humiliations suffered during childhood” - it’s the kind of statement that’ll stop conversations at polite parties, and get people edging away from you. We’ve all seen Silence of The Lambs, right?

So who are we quoting? The Unabomber? Charles Manson? Michael Jackson? Nope. It’s a Sarkozy original.

“Conveying some vulnerability to girls is a great way to build a connection, and ground who you are”, advises Mr M from Love Systems, “and stories of childhood adversity can be a great way to do this. But here’s the thing: these should be stories of how you overcame difficult situations, and how they made you the great person you are today - steer well clear of that story about how you cry whenever you travel because your father beat you with a globe.”

Be a Snappy Dresser

Named 68th best-dressed man in the world by Vanity Fair, he’s short but he’s sweet. It takes a very special person to commission a paparazzo to take their official Presidential Portrait - the sort of person perhaps who pressurises local gossip magazines to airbrush out their lovehandles (seriously!).

“Some guys really don’t care about looking good and being in style”, according to Brad P, author of The Fashion Bible. “These are the same kinds of guys who burp in public and hardly ever get laid. Women are subtle communicators. They respond best to men who speak their subtle language. Style and grooming require attention to detail. If you can create a style that has nuances and subtleties, women will assume your life has interesting nuances and that you’ll be able to understand her subtle ways of communicating.” Or: dress well to get the ladies, as my mate Dave says.

Live in the Right Neighborhood

Sexy Sarko’s first government position was in Neuilly-sur-Seine. In case you’re not a fluent French speaker, that translates to: “The Beverly Hills of Paris”. Home to Gérard Depardieu (French for “Tom Cruise”) and Jean Reno (French for “That guy from that film ‘Leon’”), it’s been a trendy place to be since the early 1200s.
None of which hurts Nico in the least…

“I live in a box,” says the infamous Paul Janka. “A box in the most expensive neighborhood in the country. The place has one window, no kitchen, a shared bathroom down the hall and a little mini-fridge that sits above incongruous $2000 Armani suits in the closet. And yet, I screw more and better looking girls than all my friends who have infinitely nicer digs.” His secret, apart from the exclusive locale? “I’ve found that women will tolerate most anything, provided the experience is candle-lit.”

Smooth.

Guys often get worked up about how to kiss a woman. Is it the right time to kiss her? How to kiss her properly? Should you kiss on the first date?

Be More Direct

“The important thing”, says Sheriff from The Mystery Method, “is to realise that women put a lot importance on kissing than men do. Most of my male friends think kissing is a guarantee they’re getting laid - but only because they’ll only normally try and kiss girls who seem so interested that it’s a sure thing!”

“If you try and kiss a girl who seems interested, even if she turns her head away, you go up in her opinion. Why? Because you had the balls to do it. Women like confident men - it’s a sign that you’re used to success - so be willing to take a risk. And if she says no, that’s fine. Continue flirting with her, rather than running away or throwing a tantrum like a little boy”.

Don’t Go Overboard in the Club

“When guys get an inch”, explains Mr M from Love Systems, “they want a mile. And sometimes you have to take a step back and let things develop at their own rate. Time after time I’ve seen guys get really hot and heavy in the club, only to find the girl won’t return their calls the next day.”

“Instead, imagine the power of teasing the girl - giving her little kisses, and then gently pushing her away. If you make her work for your attention a little, she’ll be the one ringing you the next day!”

Get Her Alone

“Girls want to meet guys, and girls like hooking up with guys”, says Braddock. “But what they don’t like is feeling like they’re easy - or worse - being labeled by their ‘friends’ as being easy or a ’slut’.”

“So use some discretion. If you’ve met a girl in a bar or a club, and things seem to be going well, don’t try and kiss her in front of her friends. Tell her it’s a bit too loud to talk where you are, and find a nice quiet secluded area where you can sit and talk, away from her friends. You’ll find she’s far more inclined to kiss you and swap numbers if she’s not got her friends staring her down!”