State Independence
Tuesday
Jul 15, 2008
Recently I have been working so much instead of sarging a ton that I got out of state when I went into the field. I noticed that if I spend two weeks out of the field then when I get back in I feel like everything is alien until I get a few sets in and everything reboots.
But a weird thing happened recently – I noticed that I would go in field and feel like total garbage and still do well.
I started to think about why this was and the ’secret’ became apparent to me. Here it is.
To get to state independence you have to have 3 things.
1. Personality
2. Self Esteem
3. Independence Realization
Personality
When we first get into the game we have a personality but we have no idea how to express it to women. We have even less of an idea on how to be that a totally giving, loving, fun, passionate, happy social guy that draws women into his own reality. We attain this through practice. We first start off with routines because we don’t know what to say and through that we learn the underlying structures, sub-communication, and the myriad of other things in game until we start to get a good sense of what types of content and communication really work in relating to women. Once we understand these levels of communication then we often start to experiment with our own material and gain our own attractive personality. What is essential is that we BECOME that awesome, interesting, fascinating guy that women are drawn too. You recognize the moment when without any conscious thought you find yourself in the present and fully representational of who you are and want to be. Everything you do, everything that you are becomes as effective as your “routines” (this btw is how I come up with new “material” it is all improvised in the field). It took me an intense year in the game to get there.
Self Esteem
Self Esteem is not EGO. Ego (and I’m using Eckhart Tolle’s definition of ego from his amazing book “The Power of Now”) is just a mental construct that who you are is what you do, what you own, or any number of other things that come from outside our selves. Self Esteem is a deep seeded belief in yourself that comes from the inside.. The belief that no matter what outside factors or even your own emotions try to affect you – they don’t alter who you are. If you have been practicing game then you have developed a personality that is attractive to women and the ability to communicate it. Self esteem is having an un-touchable belief in that inner “youness” – an untouchable belief that no matter what, you are still that giving, loving, fun, passionate, happy, social guy. You are still YOU even on a night when you don’t exhibit any of those behaviors – you still are personable even when you don’t act like it. Was Miles Davis still Miles Davis when he wasn’t playing his instrument?
Independence Realization
This came to me in field when I realized that despite how I felt on a given night; my self esteem was so strong that I could still be me even though I felt weird or out of state. My display of my character, of my personality, was so intriguing that I still attracted the opposite sex.’ This was awesome to finally realize I was starting to master my emotions. The masters (btw I never think of myself as a master, always as a student) of any art are still artists regardless of their internal state. Do you think Miles Davis could still play if he had a headache? Maybe in an off state he isn’t going to give a 200% performance but he will still be excellent. If I ask most guys ‘If you feel bad are you still you?’ they will say YES. What most guys haven’t realized is that this totally applies in field.
So all you need to do to gain state independence in field is still BE YOU regardless of how you feel. Ignore whatever garbage you have in your head or emotions and just be your personable high self esteem self. To get there you will have to spend a lot of time developing your personality – there is no magic pill that lets you get there overnight but when your personality and self-esteem are ready you will become state independent.
This works because game is when you do and say all the right things at the right time. You are giving a performance. A performance of who you are. If you are always yourself, regardless of state, you will get very similar results regardless of state.
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