Micro-Calibration is an advanced technique - this post is not for beginners! I don’t even really tend to teach this on bootcamps, unless I think the students are already sufficiently advanced - it requires a great deal of social savvy to pull off.
This article assumes you have the basic knowledge or understanding of the following:
There are four modes of communication in human interactions:
- Indicators of Interest (IOI)
- Indicators of Disinterest (IOD)
- Demonstrations of High Value (DHV)
- Demonstrations of Low Value (DLV)
Add in the idea of Compliance Tests, and the idea of punishment and reward, and you have a basic formula for social interactions!
A few years ago, I found that some girls I had to neg a million times to get any IOIs from, while others would ask me for my name or tell me I was hot as soon as I started talking to them. If they were interested, and I kept trying to show value, they’d get weirded out. If I started trying to qualify them, it often didn’t take.
I started putting in an IOI before I got them to qualify, and it started to go better:
Wrong:
Girl: “You’re cute, where are you from?”
Sinn: “Buy me a drink before you hit on me!(IOD) What do you have going for you besides your looks?(CT)”
Right:
Girl: “You’re cute, where are you from?”
Sinn: “Buy me a drink before you hit on me!(IOD) You’re very pretty (IOI), but beauty’s common. What do you have going for you besides your looks? (CT)”
This balancing of IOIs and IODs is powerful. I think of it like a seesaw: Too many IODs weighs down one side, and I’m another asshole. Too many IOIs, and I weigh down the other, and I’m the needy AFC. But if I adjust every IOD with a potential IOI and every IOI with a potential IOD, I attain balance, and my sets work like magic!
On a bootcamp, we teach you how to open (which is a very small compliance test), to false-time constrain (a DHV), and to neg every set. We also teach you how to stack forward, and start DHVing and negging, and then we teach you how to qualify and give IOIs.
But sometimes sets are warm as soon as you open them, and if you start stacking attraction material, you’re going backwards in the interaction. She’s already shown you that she’s attracted, and now you need to qualify her - you could say “Thanks, what’s your name?” which would be an IOI in return for hers.
If she IODs in return (maybe she hesitates in answering, or doesn’t ask mine back), I can then respond with an IOD - “Buy me a drink before you hit on me”, and a compliance test: “and you’re special because?”. If she answers this positively, we’re in qualification.
If she IODs again, it’s no problem: “Nevermind, I was just being polite (IOD). Oh, you have a U-shaped smile [routine] (DHV)”. There are contingencies built in depending on her reactions.
By being able to read and respond to her IOIs, we can move to qualification faster, and ultimately then in to comfort. We can also adjust what we’re doing mid-routine:
Sinn: “You have beautiful eyes” IOI
Girl: while rolling her eyes and thinking another loser “Thanks” IOD
Sinn: “Can I touch them?” IOD
However if the same interaction takes place but goes like this:
Sinn: You have beautiful eyes. IOI
Girl: “Thank you so much no one ever says that to me.” IOI
Now I have a sincere response so there is no need for me to throw the second part of the routine. We want to be able to get to the part where we’re complimenting girls and giving them IOIs.
Micro-calibration is the art of watching a girl’s responses, tailoring what you’re doing, to move quickly through to qualification.
April 21st, 2008 at 8:47 pm
Interesting to see it broken down like this.