Someone emailed me, and asked me what would I think of my son or grandson reading my articles? It got me thinking. I’m a full-time dating coach, and one day, I’ll be a father, so what advice would I give my son on meeting women?
I don’t think I’d tell him about the community, or about websites like this. But I would try and tell him how to become a man that women will be naturally drawn to.
I’d tell him about the importance of having standards that other people have to live up to, rather than living up to other peoples standards.
I’d tell him to treat everybody equally, including women. As Kipling said: “If [everyone] counts with you, but none too much”. Women don’t want you to be overly nice, or nervous, or boring, or needy. They want to be treated by you how you treat your friends.
I’d tell him to try and find something good in everyone, no matter what. And any time he was interacting with a woman, to tell her why he liked her.
I’d teach him how to make friends with everyone, but to have standards for the men and women in his life - to make sure that his friends meet his standards, especially being loyal to him.
I’d teach him to stand up for himself and not let people push him around.
I’d teach him that there are more women than men on this earth, and he never has to settle for a woman who doesn’t make him happy.
I’d teach him to play sports and get out of the house. No sitting around playing video games or watching TV.
I’d teach him to develop his passion for things, and to never make a woman the number 1 priority in his life.
I’d teach him that it’s ok to be single, or to be married. Do what makes you happy, not what other people ‘expect’ of you.
I’d teach him that sex is normal and natural, and not something to be ashamed of.
I’d encourage him to have mostly male friends and mentors, but to make sure there were girls in his social circle too.
I’d encourage him to spend some time working in sales, or as a waiter, to get him happy with interacting with strangers - and I’d encourage him to strike up conversations with people he didn’t know as soon as he was old enough for it to be safe.
I’d teach him that the most important person in any relationship he’s in is him, and that occasional arguments in relationships are normal. And that even if it gets him grounded, he should stand up to me.
I’d teach him to respect women, but also that women fart and piss just like guys, and that they love sex just as much. That a woman who makes you laugh is much more valuable to you than a woman who’s pretty but dull.
Finally, I’d teach him that you can do anything you want in your life, as long as you’re not trying to hurt anyone, and you’re honest about your intentions.
That’s what I’ll teach my son.
April 21st, 2008 at 12:55 am
This is a guy I might just want to travel to see. I’ve read some of his other stuff and he’s very level headed. Cheers.
May 10th, 2008 at 3:23 am
Sinn, that was awesome…very nicely said…nothing but respect for you man