I’m not sure how this started, but some girl must have suggested dinner and a guy with no plan and an inability to close must have agreed. Let me say again, as I did in the preface,:

You can filter the market rather easily in your choice of meeting time. In general, “no” girls will put up a stink with a late drink during the week. “Yes” girls, on the other hand, are game for most anything, and will rarely balk at a 10pm first drink Tuesday night at a quiet uptown lounge. You’re time is valuable; use such screens.

We know that dinner is the death-knell for getting laid. And yet the restaurants are packed every night with first-daters eating away. This is because women are much more clever at getting what they want from relationships than are men.

This bit on dinners deserves bullet points for the thick-headed:

• Dinners cost a bunch and you pay; you are judged on how costly the dinner is.
• An hour (or more) of talking and eating across from a girl is too much time before closing – your bullshit starts to smell.
• Eating is the antithesis of sex. It smells and makes the girl bloated and physically self-conscious.
• Food coma can set in, making you tired, and causing you to yawn, which her oversensitive ass thinks is because you’re not interested in her.
• You may fall into the “boyfriend” category and she will not give it up because she doesn’t want to ruin it.
• There is no alcohol in her system.
• You, eating, can be a turn-off; consequently, you have to watch your manners, making the meal a chore.
• After a while, the girl you thought was so hot starts to resemble a sister and whatever sexual tension may have existed yields to a “friendly” feeling.

Do you need more reasons? Dinner is fine with a girlfriend, or a wife, even a female friend you’re not attracted to, but please don’t waste time, money and probably you’re only shot at this girl by taking her to eat. You’re not trying to feed someone; you’re trying to get laid. The only exception to this is if you invert the order of the date: meet, fuck, and then eat, after you’ve worked up an appetite. Doesn’t this make more sense? Didn’t your parents always tell you not to swim after eating? Swim first, and then eat. I owe this insight to a great mentor of mine, the indomitable and loving Dominick N.

The reason I am so adamant about this comes from experience. When I was in my twenties, new to dating, I used to take women out to eat. Almost to the one, I would end the night befuddled and frustrated. What had started out so well eventually petered out. The reasons above are all legitimate. In particular, two points need elaboration.

First, is the physical nature of eating. If a girl eats a big pasta dish with garlic and seafood, and then has dessert, and coffee and gets completely stuffed (remember, you’re paying so they often attempt to gorge themselves on your ticket) and is conscious of her strong food breath, you really think she’s going to let you undress her? Doesn’t she have to take a mean shit? Or fart? Sounds gross, but think about it. This is the most unlikely condition in which she’ll put out.

Secondly, even if wine is part of the meal, or there are aperitifs or port at the end, it will be diluted by all that food. And, as we’ll see alcohol does (and has for centuries) play a central role in lower inhibitions, loosening the girl up, etc. You really want your booze dollars diluted like that?

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