Awkward Silences
Tuesday
Jun 3, 2008
This is a problem that everyone faces at some point. Beginners come up against it all the time, and even experienced guys encounter it when they least expect it. Life has a funny way of surprising you, no matter how good you are. The problem is awkwardness.
Have you ever found yourself with nothing left to say? You’re standing there with a stranger and nothing is coming out of your mouth. Anything you think of seems forced and unnatural. You just stand there as the silence begins and pans out, hoping that something will happen. You may even start to think why you’re there in the first place, but don’t just wonder off. And most importantly, don’t panic.
Unless it’s absolutely clear that they’re uncomfortable with you, relax because it’s probably all in your head. Awkwardness is far more likely to be in your mind, than an actual reality.
Now, don’t confuse this with meeting someone early, perhaps at a party, making initial contact, perhaps breaking with “I’ll see you around later” and coming back to them after a while – this is a permanently breaking off from a promising conversation for reasons that feel valid at the time, but on further inspection it makes a lot more sense to stay put. Run out of things to say? Just go quiet for a while, and don’t run away. I’ve tried this myself out of curiosity and it’s amazing how long you can just sit there before anything goes wrong. People are generally too polite to tell you to go away, and as long when you eventually do speak you say something worthwhile it’ll just look like you’re just enjoying their company.
Think it’s not going anywhere? You don’t know that – and the only way you’ll find out is if you hang around for a bit. Crack a smile – persistence is attractive, and shows confidence. The longer you persist, the more confident you appear. Of course you don’t want to push it too far and look like a stalker, but most people will bail long before that happens anyway, so don’t worry. If you’re worrying what you’re doing there in the first place – you’re out being a sociable person. It’s more likely you’re worried about one of the above, don’t worry because talking to people is NEVER a waste of your time.
So, next time the conversation goes a little quiet and you find yourself wondering what you’re going to say next, don’t panic! Just smile, take a few moments to think about what to say next and please, don’t run away! You’ll never know where it could lead if you do.
Author: To change this standard text, you have to enter some information about your self in the Dashboard -> Users -> Your Profile box. 
Comment Form