Grow Your Game

So, you’re dating a woman now whose only sexual experiences have been with men that are pump and dumpers. For those of you who don’t know what a pump and dumper is: it’s what I call ‘minutemen.’

Not the minutemen from the Revolutionary War.. They get in, they thrust their hips, they pump a few times, and then they dump all their little men: all their little sea-men to swim all over the place.

A lot of women who are young (and some unfortunately that are older) have only been with pump and dumpers and they have no idea of how unbelievably amazing sex can be with an attentive, sexually aware man. They don’t know sex with a man that has been reading these blogs – a man that really knows that sex and foreplay start right inside a woman’s mind.

So let’s say you’ve done it all right. You’ve started with sex and foreplay, and you’ve seduced her mind and you have her all turned on. How do you encourage this woman – who is basically very submissive in bed due to the fact that all of her experience is with Mr. Pump and Dump?

The reason why she is submissive, much of the time, is that she has never explored her own sexuality. A lot of women that have had pump and dumpers don’t know what they want sexually, and they are usually women that have never masturbated. They don’t know what feels good and what doesn’t. Their only experience is with Mr. P & D.

For those of you who think he is related to P & G, you’re absolutely incorrect. Pump and Dump is not Proctor & Gamble – though I heard that Proctor & Gamble makes their products for pump and dumpers. But it’s just a rumor that I heard!

Anyway, how do you encourage this woman to open up to her own sexuality?

First of all, this woman may or may not have ever had an orgasm before. I would assume that she never has. She thinks she might be having an orgasm – it might be a momentary wave – but she is not having a full-blown orgasm.

If you ask her if she’s had an orgasm, and she says, “I think so” – there is no “I think so” when it comes down to orgasms. Either you’ve had one or you haven’t! If a woman will tell you that she thinks she had an orgasm, it means that she has probably only experienced a little wave of pleasure and not a full orgasmic experience. Ladies, please chime in here and describe what a full orgasmic experience feels like so all the men know.

So let’s assume that she’s never had an orgasm. You’ve got to become the teacher in this relationship. She is probably the type of woman that just expects you to do whatever you want to do, and she’ll just lie there submissively.

So you need to show her slowly how amazing sex is. I would take some extra time and give her a full body massage. I would spend extra time kissing her and just touching her, everywhere except in her breast and her groin area.

I would take extra time when I go down on her and not only lick her, but to also touch all parts of her body also at the same time. I would also slip one finger inside as I was licking her in order to give her a different experience.

I wouldn’t ask her if she is coming. I would just continually do all the things that I know bring pleasure to a woman, and I would ask her, “how does that feel for you? Are you enjoying this? How do you like the pressure? I want to please you and I want to make you feel amazing.” Don’t say, “I want to give you an orgasm.” Don’t tell her you want her to scream and yell. Just say, “I want to make you feel wonderful. Okay?”

And take your time. Allow her to open up and allow her to see sex in an entirely different light. Don’t expect the magical orgasm right away. Don’t expect her to open up immediately. Your only job is to show her – through a soothing, relaxing, attentive sexual session – just how great sex can be.

Another way to do it, too, is when you’re having sex with her, is to do the opposite of what the pump and dumpers have done. Hold her really close to you so she can feel the tightness and feel the sensuality of sex, and then grind in very slowly as you pull her close to you. That way your pubic bone is actually massaging her clit at the same time. By doing that and staying deep inside her, you’re going to give her feelings that she has not had before and you’re going to get her to open up. You may actually get her to start having a clitoral orgasm that way, in time.

You are also going to show her a different side of sex, going to show her the sensuality of sex so that she can feel protected, warm, and nurtured during the experience.

Right now, all she feels is used. All she feels is that guys want to get inside, get off, and leave. So you’ve got to deal with the fact that she was with Mr. P & D. You’ve got to be tender and warm, and you’ve got to put absolutely no pressure on her at all.

By following these simple steps, you’re going to make her feel really comfortable, and you’re going to be able to get her to explore herself even more. She’ll surrender herself to you, in time, but you need to be very patient – because the other guys, the Mr. P & Ds, were not patient. It’s your turn to be patient now.

Juicy…

It’s really funny because men don’t need any special reason to check out a woman’s ass . . . let alone women wearing something with the word “juicy” or “belief” written across it.

I was just in the grocery store and saw a woman wearing sweatpants that had the word “juicy” on it, and then saw another one in a different aisle with the word “belief.” Every time I see this, I always think how interesting it is how many women wear things like this.

Women get so annoyed that men check out their asses, but then they go out, buy and wear sweatpants with words like “juicy” on them all but putting a neon arrow pointing to their ass.

I mean, women know we’re curious and they know we don’t like a lot of text at one time. If women really wanted men not checking out their ass, then they would put a whole paragraph on the ass of their pants.

Anyway, I believe in juicy. Really, it’s true that if we’re looking at your ass we already think you’re ass is juicy.

So on to today’s juicy blog…

Let’s talk about sex. Let’s talk about the realities of good sex.

Sex should never get boring. The truth is that if you have good and open communication with your partner about what feels good and what you desire then sex should never get boring.

You and your partner should always be wanting and willing to please each other. So if you combine that with open and honest communication about what you each desire then you are going to have some amazing sex.

Let’s also talk about something else about good sex. Everyone is always talking about new sexual positions. They want something new to do other than 69. They’ll say, “I want to do 77. I want to do 48. I want to do 62.” The bottom line is that there are probably only four or five positions that really feel good to both of you or that allow both of you to orgasm really amazingly.

Let’s go even deeper into this. Let’s say you like five positions. Then let’s say you are really good at certain foreplay things, so that’s ten or fifteen more things you like to do. Finally let’s say there are ten different places in your house that you like to have sex.

There are then more than twenty different ways you can have sex that you both really enjoy. So if the average couple has sex two days a week (which, by the way isn’t enough for me), it is going to take you months to do everything you both like one time before you have to ever repeat things. Plus, by the time you get back to repeating something, it will seem new and exciting again.

Sex should never get boring with the person that you are with, because you should always be coming up with new and fun things to do and really enjoying each other’s bodies. It is amazing when someone knows everything you like. They know how to make you feel good, and they know how to make you orgasm in ways no one else does.

Granted, the newness does wear off. Everybody loves that newness. It is so great, and I love to have, new sex.

If you think about it, though, new sex is actually nerve-racking. When you’re having sex with someone you’ve only slept with once or twice, you don’t know what they like or what they are feeling.

Being with your lover and getting to know them in every which way, however, is the ultimate intimacy. Learning somebody, feeling them, experiencing things with them, and then making love to them, is beautiful. It is a beautiful thing to experience somebody and get to know everything about their body, because just when you think you know everything about their body you find out something new.

This is girl I came across on facebook, when I was adding another chick that I had met while doing day game. I saw this girl’s picture and was blown away, so sent a quick message. Some facebook messaging, texts and phone calls later and this girl has agreed to meet me to have sex.

The transcript and commentary below details how I got from me saying, “Jesus Christ you are gorgeous,” to her saying “I’m sure me pleasing myself wouldn’t feel anything like you deep inside of me. My body twisting, moaning and begging for you to force yourself deeper and not to stop.”

Note that this sort of strategy isn’t going to work with every girl and for every guy. In this case, I have a good picture up on my profile (which is VERY important for online game), and some pretty cool pictures which the girl can browse too.

Here’s how it went down.

Soul: Jesus Christ you are gorgeous. X

This is my opening line. It’s simple, direct, and used as a screener. If she responds, then she’s complying with my attempt to pick her up. If she doesn’t respond, then I can move on to someone else without wasting my time.

Jenny: LOL! THANK YOU!

Soul: You are such a tease. There are only pictures of your daughter and a cat on your facebook! Can’t believe you don’t have any more of your gorgeous self.

You daughter is so cute by the way. You look like you’re half Asian?

I’m Sri Lankan. talk to me

Jenny: Everyone in the whole world says I look Asian! I’m actualy half Caribbean half English! And my daughter is half Turkish Cypriot! My cat’s the same mix as me!

I probably shouldn’t have mentioned the Asian thing. I think it’s always best NOT to mention things that most other guys would mention or point out. I ride it out anyway.

Soul: Are you hooked up with someone? If not, you must at least have ten guys beating down your door.

I don’t normally like waiting in queues, but give me a magazine to read and I would quite happily take ticket 11!

You are so ridiculously hot it’s not even funny.

You are either a supermodel or a cat-loving spinster I reckon. Am I close?

I continue being direct so she knows I’m not a pussy and that I am going to try to get into her pants. I inject a bit of humour to lighten things up so she sees me as a fun person to talk with and doesn’t feel any pressure.

I get no response to this last message before I head out for Friday night, so I go and have a great weekend. On Monday I remember that she never got back to me, so I chase her a little.

Soul: Jenny, you are too hot to be acting so aloof.

How was your day?

Jenny: It was good good. How about you? How funny!

She’s complied by responding. I’ve already shown her my confident and funny sides, so now I tell her a bit more about myself to build comfort – this way she’s knows I’m not just a dick on legs and can actually rationalise her attraction to me, which she’ll need to do if she is going to meet up with me.

Soul: It was interesting. My whole life is in flux at the moment as I’m trying to figure out where to take my career – do I take the plunge, quit my job and become the serial entrepeneur that I know I am capable of being, or do I work my 9-5 for a few more months.

What do you do with yourself darling, besides looking absolutely gorgeous at all times (if I was you I would look in the mirror and wink seductively at myself all day)? x

Jenny: You seize the opportunities that arise with both hands. I just broke up with my daughter’s dad so I’m trying to sort my life out!

Here’s a good opportunity to be empathetic, and also to qualify her on being a good mother, something which is bound to resonate deeply with her.

Soul: How long ago? I’m so sorry darling, that must be really rough. How long were you guys together?

Your daughter really is cute by the way, and I’ve a suspicion you’re a great mother.

Well I don’t know how much better I can make you feel over facebook, so let’s change the topic. What do you in your spare time, you know for fun?

PS: if the answer is “I have a young daughter, I don’t have fun anymore!!” then tell me about what you used to do for fun!

Jenny: Five years together. I’m a party animal! Just turned! You?

Here I give a very broad answer that shows a range of value across different areas. I don’t go into too much detail, as I want to see what she picks up on so I can figure out how to best build a connection with her.

Soul: Five years, damn. I’m sure you’re gonna be fine sweetie – everything will work itself out.

I party, I play, I work, I dance, I talk, I charm.

What sort of places do you party at?

Jenny: Anywhere with music and alcohol, baby! What do you do?

At this point it’s clear that she’s invested in the interaction as she’s responding to my messages and asking questions back. There’s no point staying in the same medium (facebook); this is a classic point where I need to escalate things to a higher degree of interaction.

Soul: Why are we sending a million messages back and forth?? I think we should take this interaction to the next level – text.

What’s your number darling? I’m going to text you when I’m out partying tonight

Jenny: Text is good! 07XXX XXX XXX

Rather than text her later as suggested and as she expected, I immediately call her – my phone game is solid and I know I can charm her and keep her thinking about me for a while with a quick 5 minute phone call. I call her, make her laugh, talk a bit, and then get ready to go out.

A few days pass. In this time. I try to arrange a meeting with her, and we loosely fix an outing with her mates for Friday night. On Friday she cancels due to her friends flaking. I had a backup anyway, as I never felt it was fixed securely. On Saturday night, I’m exhausted and come home early. I remember Jenny and send her a text to see if she’s up…

Soul: What are you up to right now darling? X

She responds and we start chat on the phone for about twenty minutes. Speaking to a girl late in the night is always good – their emotions are much more pliable when they’re alone in bed and you can normally raise the sexuality level very easily. I make her laugh and smile, lower the tone and pace of my voice and put a hint of directness in everything I say. I don’t get too explicit yet as I’m still calibrating as to how fast to escalate with her.

After our chat, I send her a text so that she has something tangible to anchor all the good feelings I just stimulated in her to…

Soul: Big goodnight kiss for you darling. I like you sleep tight x

Jenny: Thank you! I like you too honey. I’ll give you lots of goodnight kisses xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx (I gave you 17 kisses because that’s my lucky number)

Soul: Stop it, you’re making me smile! Haha, you know I haven’t had a Saturday night in in ages, but it feels so good. I’m gonna give you more kisses back and stroke your cheeks. X

Here I’m trying to escalate things further. If she’s responsive then I will keep on escalating until we get to the sexual tipping point or she stops complying.

Jenny: Well I haven’t had a Saturday night in since last Saturday! I’m glad I make you smile. That’s my aim in life, to be a clown! I’m going to give you more kisses, stroke your cheeks and run my hand down your stomach…

Soul: Darling, you are making me want to run my hand through your hair and kiss you passionately. And then turn you round and kiss the back of your neck- you are too sweet.

Jenny: MIAOW! Taking the bull by the horns are we?! I think you’re hot! I love your face. I saw your muscles- so sexy. Your arms are so huge. I like your skin colour too. Has your ego been massaged enough? Oh and I LOVE your voice. It’s super sexy.

It would be too obvious at this point to give a super sexual escalation response, so I pull it back and bring the comfort levels up again – my overall concern here is NOT to just be a guy she thinks about when she’s horny, but also a guy she can imagine spending time with when she’s not.

Soul: You know what I love about you? How open and honest you are, I’m just the same. Really want to cuddle up with you, chat and fall alseep right now. So tired! x

Jenny: I think my honesty and my openness are my biggest flaws. I’m tired too. Would love a snuggle on those arms. I’d probably want a bit more too though

Soul: Honey, if I wasn’t so tired and needed sleep, I would get in a taxi right now amd give you exactly what you needed. Til then, I’ll just imagine it x

Jenny: Well you’re free to imagine what you want. I give you permission to explore my whole body I’m going to bed now though cos I need sleep too. Will text tomorrow if you want. X

The night passes.

Soul: Darling it’s morning and I’m still thinking about you. Wish you were here so I could slide in between your legs and fuck you all morning long… xxx

Jenny: What a text to wake up to! Have I created a monster? You’re a tiger.

Soul: Hehe, good morning kisses for you. hope you had a good sleep?I feel so much more rested now. Gonna have a good breakfast too x

Jenny: I’m so relaxed I’m finding it hard to move. Glad you feel refreshed. What are you having for breakfast other than fantasies of what we could be doing together?!

There’s a two hour break in our texting when one of my girls comes over for breakfast and sex. After she leaves, Jenny and I continue texting all day. I run some standard comfort stuff – again, all in the interests of preventing flaking – and also spike sexuality levels by being direct and describing sexual things we are going to do together, e.g. eat ice cream off each other.

I try to arrange a meet up, but between her trying to find a babysitter and me travelling to Las Vegas for the next week it has to wait until I get back. I’m aware that I need to keep myself in the forefront of her mind as I leave, so that even if she hooks up with someone else in the interim, she still wants me when I get back.

The next day at work I am horny as fuck thinking about her and send her a text…

Soul: Baby, I wanna bounce you up and down on my dick and then bend you over my desk at work – so I can fuck you senseless while we both enjoy the view over London. X

Jenny: How can you be having these thoughts when you should be working. That body, firm and toned between my legs, I’m going to explode before we meet! I’ll make sure I have ice cream but you have to bring protection because I’m a lady and would never buy those things!

This is so on.

Soul: Sounds like a plan darling. So confirmed a) I’m seein you Friday XXth, b) You’re sending me pictures so I can shoot my load over thoughts of you in the meantime. Xxx Mwah

Jenny: Absolutely x

I message her while I’m in Vegas, get on the phone to her as soon as I’m back, push forward the meeting, and seal the deal a day earlier than planned.

With kino there is an obvious ladder of escalation. Grabbing a girl’s ass is obviously more escalated than touching her shoulder, and for the most part it’s pretty common sense. So when we talk to girls, we start out at an initial kino level, either a touch on the arm or the claw, then escalate progressively from there.

Similar to kino, there is also a verbal escalation ladder. We all have a natural basic understanding of this which looks like:

Friendly topics (movies, music, good bars, etc.) -> personal topics (grew up in Chicago, etc.) -> sexual discussion (I want to turn you around and fuck you from behind while I pull your hair)

What separates verbal escalation from kino escalation is that verbal de-escalations can actually hurt the pick-up. So for instance while slapping a girl’s arse then touching her arm is fine, you generally don’t want to go from talking about sex to talking about names for 80’s dogs.

Every statement/question falls somewhere on a verbal escalation scale.

Some examples of different types of statements -

80’s dogs opener – non sexual, non personal.
“So what is it about social work that you love?” – non-sexual, personal
“I think you’ve got the most amazing eyes” – sexual and personal.

Here’s the Verbal Escalation Ladder as I understand it (the top being the most escalated):

Statement about both sexually – I can see the two of us on a beach naked just going at it in the sand.

Question about both sexually – Oh man, can you imagine what would happen if the two of us were left alone together?

Statement about both personally – I can tell we’re two of a kind, it’s really rare.

Question about both personally – Why does it feel like we know each other so well?

Statement about her sexually – You have the sexiest grin.

Question about her sexually – What is it that a guy does that drives you wild?

Statement involving you/her personally – You would love ____ book.

Question involving you/her personally – What made you decide to move to SF?

Statement involving you/her impersonally – you have a southern accent/that’s a cool hat.

Question involving her impersonally – what’s the occasion/have you been to NYC?

Statement involving neither you nor her – American Beauty is a great movie

Question involving neither you nor her – What’s a good name for my friend’s puppies?

The idea is clearly to progressively make your way up the ladder. Usually this takes the form of 2 steps forward, one step back, bob around there for a while, move forward again to test the water, back down again etc. Just like with kino, I’ve found that you can actually progress up the ladder a lot quicker than you might think, so push the boundaries and see how much unnecessary banter you can actually cut out of the interaction – assuming you’re going for a day1 pull.

De-Escalation – The quickest way to blow your value

In my experience, there is no more sure-fire way to ruin a set than to de-escalate either because you’re scared or insecure. An obvious example would be, she says “I like it when guys rub my shoulders” and you get scared and say “ha, heh, hey are you going to that party on Saturday?” (oh man, I used to always do this back in my chode days. Then I’d try to revive the escalation and talk about back massages after I’d already mucked it up- makes me cringe now thinking about it)

Interestingly enough, people’s natural reaction to a perceived drop in their own value is to verbally de-escalate. (I’m using “verbally de-escalate” to mean jump from one point on the ladder to a lower point.) While in any interaction you’re going have to naturally de-escalate anyway (you can’t be talking about sex forever), I’m talking specifically about de-escalations as a result of a perceived self value drop.

For instance, say you’re talking about how she has a sexy grin, then some dude carrying a tray squeezes by you, placing you in an awkward position physically as you make room for him. Your natural reaction is going to be once he passes to verbally de-escalate down to talking about a good movie or something and from here to re-climb the ladder. This is weak sauce. Resuming at the same escalation level will actually build your value and increase her attraction to you.

This is in many ways what inner-game is all about. Being self-assured and internally centered so that external events (the guy with the tray) don’t elicit a negative reaction from you (de-escalating).

Another common verbal de-escalation following a perceived drop in value happens when guys get in their own head after ‘messing something up’. For instance if the girl gives a shit test and the guy feels like he didn’t pass it well (this is a total chode mindset, but we’re talking about his perception here). The guy will almost always step back and verbally de-escalate. Or if he spills his drink, same thing- there’s really no shortage of examples.

Interestingly enough, de-escalating after the failed shit-test is more damaging than actually failing the shit test (or spilling the drink or anything else). Whereas continuing un-phased is going to significantly boost your value to the girl. So ultimately the only factor of significance to the girl is your self-perceived value, which is completely determined by you and only you.

Develop your inner game and let the pieces fall into place.

We’ve all been there. You start flirting with a women and she’s hot and bothered for you, but then out of the blue she won’t answer your phone calls. Where did you go wrong? Did you say something stupid? Did you send the wrong text? Or did you not know what to say in the first place?

There’s a strong reason why women are attracted to George Clooney and Brad Pitt. Besides the way they look, it’s the way they walk, talk, look at women and the final thing is they’ve unlocked the Good Dog / Bad Dog theory.

Woman want to be your dirty nasty bad girl! The only way to do this is to unlock her inner bad girl. You have to start to think about the dynamic of how women think in order to unlock their inner bad girl. To unlock a woman’s inner bad girl, you need to make it a safe place for her to unlock the dirty side of her mind.

Most men do not understand this dynamic, and when they talk about sex they talk about it in raw terms. For instance, a man will say “I want to have sex with you right now.” A woman hears “All you care about is getting off, and you don’t care about my pleasure.” Or, a man will say “I’m feeling so horny today that I’m about to explode!” A woman hearing this will think “Well, why don’t you just jerk off then since there’s nothing in it for me!”

These are some of the reasons that flirtatious beginnings crash when they’re about to take off. Men need to realize that women are wired inside their mind. Deep sexual seduction starts inside a woman’s mind- not inside her groin. For a second, think inside your mind, and think what you feel like when you meet someone new. Here’s the obvious things. You’re attracted to her body. You’re attracted to her face. You anticipate seeing her for the very first time. You have similar interests.

Now let’s say you’ve gone out with her one or two times and you’ve made out with her, but you haven’t done anything deeper. You think you’re doing all the right things, but what you’re forgetting about is turning on the switch inside her mind that creates and lets go of her dirty girl! Now, most men think about the obvious things- they get lost inside the obvious things. They think like a man! They think about sex, and they have a desperate energy about them. All they are thinking about is getting the woman back to their place so they can try to have sex with her.

A woman in this situation who initially felt a connection, will immediately in her mind switch from a feeling of excitement to one of caution. They put the brakes on in their head and they look for things to go wrong- and a man not knowing this will actually play right into that. I call this ‘The Scared Puppy Disease’ Women feel all sorts of things. The problem is that you’re pushing them too much into the sexual tone, instead of allowing them to embrace their inner dirty girl.

Let me give you a couple examples – they will think these things:

1. “I like him, but I felt this way before and it did not work out.”

2. “Does he feel the same way as me? Is he having the same connection as me emotionally, or is he just looking to get laid, because he is talking about sex a little too much.”

All this leads to them taking a jab at you to protect them from falling for you if you’re the wrong guy. For instance, they will say something to you like “Are you just looking to have sex, or are you trying to get to know me?” Or they’ll say “I’m not looking for just sex. I’m looking for someone to connect with emotionally.” This is what I call ‘The Very Scared Puppy Disease’.

So what do you do in this situation? Most men will get defensive and they’ll say “I’m not looking just for sex. I want to meet somebody great!” In that situation a woman hears “He’s just looking for sex ’cause he got defensive.” Women hear things differently from men. You need to learn how to ’speak woman’.

One way to do this is to read between the lines and lob in a “good girl” at her. Just like a puppy, women need praise to keep going. So if she gets defensive in an email, instead of you defending yourself back, you need to validate what she’s telling you in a very simple way: Tell her that you’re really enjoying connecting with her. That’s it! That’s what she’ll hear. Hearing these simple words of praise and reassurance from you will continue the intense flirting, and they will allow her to feel good about her decision and her feelings of a dirty sexual nature. This is called “The Good Girl Praise.” Women live in fear of being hurt, and as the men it’s your job to encourage her. Encourage her to be the sexual being that she so desires!

Ever just know that a woman is into you? To the point where you know you can sleep with her if you play your cards right? And ever just fuck up at some point, crash and burn?

What happened, is that you didn’t respect The Power Play. What is a Power Play? It’s when a woman is at a heightened emotion state, whether it be really happy, sad, mad, sexual, or whatever. Or when there is a general window of opportunity (i.e. the two of you are alone by coincidence).

When she is in this heightened emotional or coincidental state, is the point when she is most likely to leave or sleep with you.

Many men miss out on this opportunity, because they simply don’t understand its importance, and ignore it until it’s too late. The point when she goes back into a neutral state of mind.

Jeepers Creepers: “I like Gummi Bears! I have four different colored Gummi Bears. Choose one and I’ll tell you a secret about yourself. There’s a red one, a blue one…”

Sigh. At least he’s catching on to commonalities. Why don’t I like bouncing around? I have found that in many of my one-night stands, by initiating a Power Play, there was no need for me to go anywhere other than a place to have sex.

And when you bounce around, you allow for numerous interruptions to occur. She could grow tired, a friend could call, she could get sick, etc. In short, bouncing around does not work to your advantage.

Now, let’s move on to the types of Power Plays. And remember, we do not wait until the end of the night, we initiate a Power Play when she is at a heightened emotional state, whether it’s at the end of the night or not.

The Verbal Power Play

The Verbal Power Play is the Power Play you use to go to the place where you’re going to have sex. Now, if you’ve been following this guide, then you have commonalities that you’ve been focusing on.

Let’s look at an example of a Verbal Power Play in which our connection is that we both have a dog:

Assanova: “Yeah, my dog is crazy! He likes to run into walls, I swear! I have no clue why he does it!”

Girl: “Hahahaha! That’s funny!”

Assanova: “He’s so retarded! Let’s go visit him and
see if he does it!”

Girl: “Ok! Let me tell my friends that I’m leaving.”

Three things in this. One, I’m not waiting until the end of the night. I’m leaving while she is at an emotional high. Two, I’m controlling her emotional state by making it sound exciting. And three, it’s a legit excuse for her to leave with me. Thus, she does not look slutty.

Now let’s look at the opposite end of the spectrum:

Girl: “This bar is really dull. I’m getting bored.”

Assanova: “Yeah, it is boring. I wanna see those pictures of you with Peewee Herman that you keep talking about. Let’s go check them out.”

Girl: “You’re going to feel so stupid when you see that I wasn’t lying.”

Assanova: “Yeah, we’ll see.”

Again, she doesn’t look slutty. And again, I’m using the topic of our connection as the reason to leave. She is at a saddened emotional state and I’m acting on it. If she becomes neutral again, she might want to stay at the bar, so that’s the reasoning for acting quickly.

In one instance, that actually happened. I left with a girl from a party within ten minutes. The interaction went something like this. I walk into a room upstairs:

Girl: “You look like you smoke weed!”

Assanova: “Yup. Wanna go smoke a blunt at my place?”

Girl: “Yeah.”

She spent most of the time telling her friends that she was leaving. Our actual interaction was that fast. How do I know this? I came with a group of friends, and before all of them even made their way inside of the house, I was walking out with this girl. I didn’t wait around; I took advantage of her heightened emotional state.

One crucial part of the Power Play is that you must act as if it’s perfectly normal. If you seem too eager, she will instantly back out. However, if it seems like normal behavior from you, she will have no problem leaving with you.

And most importantly, you must assume that she will say yes. When some men leave with women, they’ll actually fuck up their own game by doubting themselves.

For instance, instead of going to the bedroom and just going with the flow, they’ll say something dumb like:

Jeepers Creepers: “I’m going to spend the night. Where’s your bed at?”

Girl: “Umm, you’re not staying here. My roommates will be home soon.”

At least he made it this far. However, he’d probably be fucking her right now if he would have just shut up, and took things one step at a time.

The Physical Power Play

I was asked about “kino” or when to touch a woman. My answer? I don’t touch her until she touches me. But what happens if she doesn’t touch me? What now?

This is no different than the Verbal Power Play. If I catch her at a heightened emotional state, I go in. This has happened several times at bars. Guys kept asking me how I was making out with women so fast, because they couldn’t figure it out. An example might go like this:

Assanova: “I wanna kiss you.”

Her emotional state is obviously that of shock, and I go in for the kiss. In essence, it was a matter of shocking her first, heightening her emotional state. Had I just walked up to her, grabbed her, and tried to kiss her, she would have pulled away her face before I even got close.

It’s ‘place her in the heightened emotional state, and then proceed’, not the other way around. Remember that. The same goes for when you’re in the bedroom.

Most of my one-night stands go a little something like this, in the place where sex will take place:

1) Focus on our commonalities.

2) Slow down the speed of my voice, thus placing her in a heightened sexual state.

3) And since I am the dominant personality, she subconsciously matches my sexual state by lowering and slowing down her voice.

4) I kiss her. We fuck.

I’m not going to cover last minute resistance, because if you’ve been following this guide, it shouldn’t happen. The solution is to just back off. If nothing is seriously wrong, then she’ll come after you.

Jeepers Creepers: “You mean I can get laid without the
use of painfully memorizing routines from my routine
book?”

Yes, Jeepers Creepers, it really is that simple.