Grow Your Game

In order to grab the woman that you want, you need to learn the art of walking away. Most men will not walk away.

What happens to most men is that they’ll go to a party, find a woman they want to talk to, smother her, and they won’t leave…this results in the woman’s attraction level dropping each minute this continues. The opposite result occurs, i.e., the attraction increases, when you walk away from a woman to whom you’re most attracted.

Take this example. You walk up to talk to a woman you’re really attracted to, you connect and have a good conversation with her for a couple of minutes, and then…you walk away. When you walk away, it gives her a moment to reflect and to think “That guy just walked away. No one just walks away. Most men smother me. How come this guy just walked away?”

It creates powerful intrigue in her mind. She’s wondering who you are, what you’re all about, and how you could walk away from her. It creates incredible attraction on her part.

So then what will happen is she will find a way to find you again at the party. Or, you’ll walk around that party and the minute she sees you, she’ll plant a very seductive, sexy smile on you so you stop. Or, she’ll talk to you about something going on at the moment or ask you a question to reignite the conversation that she was having with you before.

Most guys are afraid to walk away from a woman they’re really attracted to, because it took a lot of nerve to talk to her in the first place. What you learn when you practice speaking to a lot of different women, however, is that walking away from a woman you’re interested in is the only way to see whether or not you’ve connected with her. When you’re in Smotherville – smothering a woman with conversation that may or may not be going anywhere – you’re just talking to her in random thoughts and thus not really knowing if you connect with her or not.

Why do women always go for the “bad boy?” Why do women always go for the guy who doesn’t like them or doesn’t pay them any attention? Because that man has learned the art of “the walk away.”

You need to learn and perfect the art of the walk away, and you need to use it the next time you see a beautiful woman and you talk to her. This is what you’ll do:

After you’ve been talking to her for a few minutes, you need to walk away, let her simmer for five or six minutes or…twenty minutes, and let her see you talking to other people. It’s going to bring out an incredible competitive fire in her, especially if you’re speaking with other women. It doesn’t matter what the women look like, it’s sufficient that they’re just other women. Or, if you’re speaking to men, it also works if everyone is laughing because you’re giving them the best of you. All of the sudden that woman is simmering so much, that she’s going to come back because you have the power of the walk away.

You have to master the power of the walk away in order to attract beautiful women everywhere you go. This is because women love a leader, and women love men who can walk away from something right at the height of the conversation. It’s going to make them want more…and that’s what you need to create. You need to create desire in women, so they want you more.

Lets talk a little bit about body language and how it relates to your attitude and confidence. We all know that people communicate with each other on multiple levels. But did you know that spoken words is just 7% of what we communicate? The majority of communication is done with vocal tones, vocal pitch, movement, body language and gestures. All of these things and more make up our composite body language expressions, such as: Facial expressions, voice intonation, speed of speech , how you walk, the way you carry yourself through the world, having eye contact, how fast you move, and even our breathing.

You may ask why body language is so important. First, because it is how we sub-communicate with others. This sub-communication is even more important that ever before, because society has created a link between our actions and how people feel. For example, when you are in room and you feel really nervous, everyone in the room will pick up that you are nervous by your actions, tonality, and speed of your movements. Such things are very obvious, especially to children who are not preoccupied with speech as much as many adults. You can see when somebody is sad, happy, excited, honest, or angry. Look at somebody who rapidly moves his foot up and down. This guy probably can’t look anybody in the eyes and is sub-communicating that he is insecure. Somebody who is hunched over, with her feet together, is subconsciously trying to not be noticed at all.

We can find wealth of information about other people by their body language. In terms of seduction, we learn to read what females are saying on a deeper level. An outgoing woman will do the exact same to you, she could tell you a zillion things that you are projecting, just by your image. Let me quote my girlfriend here: “I can see if a guy is good in bed, just by the way he walks.” That is so true. They can tell everything about you, just by the way you look. It comes from all those years of experience of guys hitting on them.

If you go out dressed like you do not care about your image at all, you probably don’t care, and women will notice this. On the other hand, if you go out dressed as a socially cool guy, you probably are a pretty damn smooth dude. As for the woman, this process of screening by looks and body language is a self-defense mechanism. She really doesn’t want to hook up with some low self-esteem loser, or some boring guy who doesn’t know how to give her some fun in her life. So they screen you and try to find out as many things about you as possible in a very short period of time.

Imagine, if you are a HOT girl, would you give 30 minutes of your time to each boring geek that hit on you?? No, you would give him 30 seconds and then the “F#*& off” line.

This is because she already knows that he is a boring, lame-ass guy. But what if some super-ultra confident guy, who is well dressed, comes into a room, walks slowly towards a hot girl with a smile on his face, and starts a conversation with a girl? Would she reject him??

Exactly. She would not.

Now let me ask you who the really confident in our society are, the ones with an attitude larger then life. Who are they?? Rockstars, company directors, successful managers, doctors, politicians…. etc.

Take a look at how they walk, how they sit, how they speak, and you’ll notice something really interesting. They are totally calm, like they control TIME. They are not in hurry. The way they move and how they speak completely radiates with super-confidence.

Lets take a look at what the most common mistakes are when somebody tries to pick up a girl:

• Talking too fast (being nervous)
• Talking too much (trying to impress her)
• Not knowing what to say next (not enough practice)
• Drinking (to become comfortable)
• Asking too many questions (you create rapport too soon, but she doesn’t want your rapport unless you have attracted her first)
• Body language wrong (hands connected, feet too close, shoulders down, leaning in)
• Buying her drinks (trying to buy her over, or even worse, trying to get her drunk)
• Not being comfortable talking with strangers (social anxiety)

Does any of this radiate with any confidence??? Hell no!! Take a look and see that every action here projects INSECURITY!!

Ok, let’s correct this poor body language together. Here is list of things that you must FIX…

• Keep your hands out of your pockets.
• Stand with you feet wider apart.
• Never look down when you walk, look above the horizon
• Stand with your chest pushed outwards
• Keep your shoulders relaxed and back
• Walk confidently and slowly with bigger steps
• Take up lots of space, no matter where you are
• Pay attention to how you dress
• Always lean back.
• Touch people when you talk with them (non-sexual), because you must create conversation on all levels, not just verbal. (Later she is going to be used to your touch, and that is perfect for the pre-sex stage!)
• All your body language should be comparable in speed. For instance, moving with confidence is good, but it looks incongruent if you talk fast at the same time.

One more really important thing my friend would tell you, “Pick-Up doesn’t start when you approach her, it starts when you WAKE UP in morning!” and that’s so true!

Let’s move on to the subject of attraction:

In order to attract a woman, you must first understand why and how they think. Why the state of attraction exists, and how it happens.

The easiest way to understand and explain this is through something known as ‘Switches theory’. You know those on/off switches you have in your house for electricity? Now imagine you have 15 of them in one box. That’s an analogy for how our minds work. Women have switches such as “Is he attractive?, is he good at sex?” on or off.

Every girl out there has a different set of switches, because it really depends on their culture, their childhood, their beliefs and their age, plus a few other minor things. However, there are some common switches you must turn ON to all girls out there.

You must be:

• Challenging
• Alpha
• Interesting
• Unpredictable
• Stylish
• Not needy
• A good lover
• Humorous
• Capable of building strong rapport
• Secure
• Trustworthy
• Conversational

Now, those switches can be either ON or OFF. There is no value in-between… for geeks, it’s all off.

What happens when you switch on most of those switches?? Wow… she starts to be interested in you… actually… she starts to show IOIs (indication of interest). This reaction is totally normal. When she meets a guy who is funny, good looking, interesting, romantic, and not needy, she becomes interested in getting to know him better (read: sleeping with him).

Switching on these switches is what demonstrates personality to a woman. You can tell stories where you were romantic. You can hook her with interesting snippets of your life and make her ask you questions where you get to reveal your romantic side. It doesn’t matter, as long as the you flip the romantic switch to the ON position. Every story or routine you have in your arsenal is saying something to her (flipping switches.) When designing routines and stories, you need to first take a look at what you want to convey to her.

The easiest way to switch on lot of switches is through good body language, behavior, and a sense of style.

Lets take a look at me for example. If you’ve never seen the way I look, take a look at my webpage photo here…

Okay, let’s analyze this together… what do you think about this guy just from this photo? Here is what others have said:

• He has a lot of confidence
• He looks like some badboy or a really adventurous guy
• Good looking (average)
• He is drinking expensive cocktails, so he probably has some money…
• Sex must be amazing with him
• He is alpha, he doesn’t worry what others think
• He doesn’t look like some predictable guy…
• Not so needy

Ok, guys, you get my point… I switched On like 10 switches just by the way I look and behave. There are also switches I haven’t flipped yet:

I don’t have trust, rapport, I am not romantic, interesting… and that’s it fellas!!!!

That means 5 stories for 5 more switches. That’s like 5 X 5 minutes = 25 minutes to get a girl.

Of course you can convey all those things through conversation, and that’s fine. But it will take 10X longer! This is the way it works for me, and I am happy.

What does it really mean to give value, why does spending time with some people make you feel good regardless of whether they actually do anything which directly benefits you. What is it about some people that makes you feel drained after they leave. Why are some people always selfishly taking from others?

Giving value applies not just to us as PUAs in relation to what we give to girls. It also applies to wings as in what value they give to each other and to girls that interact with you.

One thing about value which a lot of PUAs don’t seem to be aware of is what it means to be a good wing. Bad wings can kill not only your state but also your ability to actually PU anyone. I’ve had a few experiences now where wings basically come out, watch you open a set, come in, AMOG you and then relentlessly pursue the hottest girl in the group. Chodes almost always have very bad, hugely selfish wings and it’s one of the reasons they don’t get laid!

I had one set last year go down like this:

Me: Hi guys. What’s up. Vibe Vibe Vibe.

Two minutes of conversation.

Girls: Where are you from, what’s your name, etc..

My ‘friend’ appears: (speaking overly loudly while invading my personal space, grabbing my shoulder hard while also shaking me slightly) Hey dude, it’s your round.. Get me a …

Basically this guy has learned that AMOG / Blowout game makes you look alpha.

Slight digression but naturals do this a lot, a recent example being a guy who said to a 3 set of mine last week “This guy’s a player I’ve seen him doing this with lots of other girls” Obviously this guy’s retarded and forgetting his intent, it’s not exactly a bad thing for him to say.

Anyway how to respond to something like that.

1. Either actively fight for the girls.. “Sorry dude, I’m talking”. Look alpha but also possibly cheap and like you don’t value your friends over the women.

2. Get the drink, allow the wing to loiter about, eventually take set and fuck it up.

I did number two at the time. Now I’d probably just ignore completely which after a few more of these I’ve found worked the best.

Getting back to the main point of this, giving value when your out with wings is that when you’re out with guys you should really feel you have a duty to help them as much as possible. If you don’t, go out alone.

Questions I now ask myself when winging.

How can I help my wings PU move more quickly.?
Will doing this help my wing get laid?

Now the wings I have at the moment are awesome, they generally DHV me to girls, and we work together to ‘own’ venues.

What I think some people need to become aware of is that:

a. Actively pursuing girls who your wing is into is counter productive, actively chatting up girls on behalf of your wing however is a great move and meets little or no resistance.
b. There are millions of women in the world and if you don’t personally know hot chicks who would date you, it’s basically your laziness and fear that’s the problem.
c. AMOG game is not something to unleash on ‘friends’ you are out with. Doing it is loser behaviour! Although it might well get you laid, do this on chodes if you must, provided you actually have the balls.
d. If you find yourself in a venue speaking to groups, involving your wing is always a good idea. If you have any doubts about that, get new wings.
e. Wings should be relentlessly pumping each others state.
f. Wings should be encouraging opening of all sets.
g. When out PUAs need to agree who’s into who early on and stick to it.

Re point a. Chatting up girls on behalf of your wing.

Let’s say your wing opens a set of ridiculously hot girls, chats for 10 mins, they laugh and really like him, he introduces you and you get chatting to the hottest one as frequently happens.

You could do the chode thing and attempt to chat her up yourself BUT if you instead start qualifying her on behalf of your wing, DHV him to her and start making her question whether she is good enough. “My wing is the one of the greatest guys I know”, “you’re not going to be one of those girlfriends who takes people away from their friends are you”, “so can you cook”, “are you good in bed”, “rich”, etc. etc. You not only make yourself seem very cool, you also are 20 times more likely to get in with this girl’s friends. When she inevitably pulls your wing, her mates will now be feeling social pressure to hook up with you.

Wings can either kill the whole thing or get you laid.

The four qualities that lead to mating success in the animal kingdom (including humans) are:

Dominant
Attractive
Elite
Access to resources

Now would be a good time for you to figure out what’s been stopping you from showing these qualities in the past. You can easily convey them with your clothing, if only you could stop the blockage inside you that says “I’m scared to wear that.”

I’ve done quite a few makeovers in my live training, and it seems like most men have the same issues holding them back. It’s not a lack of information; the information is out there and it’s yours for the taking. Most guys just filter it out, thinking “Nah, that stuff’s not for me.” They limit themselves before even trying anything new. Let’s take a look at some of the sources of that limited way of thinking.

When I look back on what I was wearing a few years ago, I can see that I was sabotaging all of my interactions with women. I wanted to date and sleep with lots of attractive women, but the way I was dressing was turning them off immediately and I just didn’t realize it. There was an easy way to fix this – the answer was right in front of my face – but I just couldn’t see it.

I consider myself a pretty intelligent person. I’ve spent the last thirteen years studying psychology and philosophy, so how was it that I could be so blind to something that now seems so obvious?

What I discovered was that like most men, I had layers and layers of self-delusion which prevented me from seeing what was really going on. After I finally figured it out and developed a great look, I started giving makeovers to other guys who were working on succeeding with women. I discovered that almost everyone has their own version of these same delusions.

This is “negative social programming.” It’s almost impossible to avoid picking up some of this from the world around you. It’s imperative that you identify your negative social programming if you ever want to move past it.

Playing It Safe in the Schoolyard

The first obstacle that a man faces is the “play it safe” mentality that we all develop when growing up.

It’s normal for children to make fun of each other and to compete for social dominance in school. That’s how they establish a social hierarchy and learn lessons that will be valuable later in life. At times this competition can be very intense, and all of us have been on the losing end of it at one time or another.

The easiest way for a child to gain a social advantage over others is to make fun of something obvious, something different.

If you make fun of someone different, you can gain the respect and allegiance of the entire school, not just the kid you made fun of. There are massive social benefits if you can successfully taunt other children. As a result, the kids who are different always get teased the most. It could be that the target is of a different ethnicity, from a different social class, has a different way of talking, or that he just looks different.

All it takes to look different is a slightly unusual haircut, a slightly different way of dressing, etc. It doesn’t take much. Think back to your grade school days. Was there a boy with long hair or a girl with short hair that got teased? Was there someone from another country or a kid who was a bit poorer than average?

In the adult world, these differences are accepted and even embraced. In the world of children, these differences are grounds for harassment. This harassment is the fuel that feeds social competition and establishes the social structure that will be enforced day in and day out for the entire school year.

Chances are that at some point in your life you were that kid who was different. The harassment we endure as children causes us to build up a tendency to play it safe, to blend in, to do anything we can to avoid looking different.

Even kids who are normal in every way observe the persecution of those who are different, and this causes them to build up this same “play it safe” tendency.

There’s nothing wrong with this when you’re a child or adolescent. It’s a useful adaptation that allows you to go through life without being damaged and distracted by harassment. The problem is that many people carry this “play it safe” mentality into their adult life and it no longer serves a purpose. The rules have changed, and being different can be an advantage.

This “play it safe” mentality can cause limited belief in yourself and make you seem timid and immature.

The end result is that you have few choices in how you dress. You are unable to employ the best strategies, you are unable to utilize your creativity to the fullest, and you communicate a child-like fearfulness to the people around you.

Your physical appearance. It’s often one of the first things that woman notice about you. Thus, it should be at the top of your priorities when improving yourself. No matter if it’s in the work place, seduction world, or life in general, healthier looking people go farther than the unhealthy looking. Not to mention that they can get away with a lot more. Ever heard the phrase “If you’re ugly, it’s sexual harassment, but if you’re beautiful, it’s flirting.”? I’ve mentioned this before, and I’ll mention it again, you must focus on eliminating your negative features first. This includes scars, jacked up teeth, unkempt hair, acne, etc.

You’d be surprised at how well you’ll look if you simply eliminate your negative features. There are products out there that can easily fix these, so I’ll let you look for them. I’m not going to make a grocery list, because the focus of this project, is to keep it as simple, and as short, as possible. Once you figure “Hey, there really isn’t anything negative left for me to realistically improve.”, then you’re ready to start working on the positive. You now have a good base to work with. What is this? Things like teeth whitening, manicures, skin tone adjustments (tanning). I tell you to work on the negative, and then the positive, because I don’t want you overloading yourself with products and procedures. Everything takes time, small steps.

Speaking of small steps, your body. The thing that worked best for me, was just to take everything slow, and monitor everything that I was doing. This includes looking at nutrition facts when I shop, avoiding the snack and soda aisles, and making sure I got the nutrition I needed in order to reach my weight goals. Now, what a lot of you fat fuckers will do, is tell yourself “only one more snack won’t set me back”. Well, I have news for you. It was that “one more snack” that got you to where you are. I had a friend that would order a ton of food, and when I would mention his “diet”, he’d say “Well, I already ordered, so I can’t waste it.” The truth is, he knew exactly what he was doing, and was just looking for an excuse to do it. And that just pisses meoff. Stop making excuses for yourself and just do it.

Results aren’t going to happen over night. Like I said, you must monitor everything. I know that I weighed myself at least once a week, and there were times when I would actually lose the weight I was trying to gain. As your body is adjusting to your diet, it’s going to fluctuate like that at first. However, you must stick to your plan, and don’t take any
shortcuts (diet pills, steroids), as they only work in the short run. With time, hard work will pay off, and you know it. Those who say “this isn’t working” are those expecting instant results, and just want an excuse to go back to their lazy health habits. DO NOT FALL INTO THAT TRAP. Lastly, I’m going to tell you this right now, people will do whatever it takes to discourage you, most namely, your friends.

They’ll tell you that it isn’t working, they’ll make fun of you, tell you to give up- anything to get you to
quit. You have to IGNORE THEM. Chances are, you will surpass them anyway, and end up in an entirely different social circle. Trust me. I use to weigh 130 pounds when I first came to college (I now weigh 180), and when I started gaining weight, experimenting with working out, I got made fun of all of the time. There were constant jokes, like “what do you lift, the bar?”. I am no longer friends with these
people. Once again, you must get over your ego, and ignore them. You control your destiny, not them. You are doing this for you, your well being, and if they don’t support you, then they weren’t worth being friends with in the first place.

Another returned book on attracting women:

Vanilla: “Omari, I can’t read this shit. It’s too long and
complicated.”

This had happened time and time again. My friends would see the way I attracted women, and when they asked me how I was doing it, I would just shove them a book from my book collection, out of sheer laziness to bother to explain my methods. What I didn’t tell them, was that I never used most, if any, of the advice in those books. Like Vanilla said, they were just too long and complicated. Only nerds could understand them, and only nerds had the time to read them and break them down.

Then it occurred to me, before I even had the balls to even approach women, I was still getting laid before all of my friends in grade school. Why was this? And why is it that I do very little now, and still manage to attract women fairly easily? It couldn’t be just looks alone, because I wasn’t that
physically attractive until fairly recently. There had to be more to it. That’s when I sat down and examined everything about my relationships with women, both past and present, and looked at why they were attracted to me. When it was all said and done, I came down to one conclusion. Most of the material that is readily available in the seduction community was an utter waste of time, money, and space. All in all, it was just a downright overcomplicated mess, that in the end, just left more men
not only with an empty bed, but an empty bank account as well.

Attracting women could be broken down into five simple Verses, or simple areas that the average, everyday, normal guy, could easily focus on without worrying about which routine or step to take next, out of the literally thousands available.

What are these areas?

Power
Sincerity
Sexuality
Health
Lifestyle

Here’s a verse on power:

The Verse On Power

Power. What is power?
Money. Does money equal power?

No. I’ll tell you what equals power. Being at the top of whatever your field is. When you’re the best of the best, you attract followers. And with followers, comes leverage. And leverage? No amount of money can buy true leverage.

I need only state the Chinese Revolution as evidence of this true power I speak of. Mao Zedong had no money. All he had was leverage, from his followers, who followed him because of his ability to be the best in his field. No amount of money could take away his leverage. That’s true power, and that’s exactly what women are attracted to.

When I was younger, I wasn’t the best-looking guy, but I could fight really well, and I was funnier than just about anyone I knew at the time. I had several friends, several followers. People laughed. People feared. The women came. My point is, a lot of you have the ability to gain power, but you just don’t realize it yet. You’re blinded by the false power known as currency. When you go after something, strictly for the financial gain, and the financial gain alone, you limit your ability to be the best at something you’re actually talented at.

I’ve done it. I have my insurance license, several computer certifications; I tried pharmacy, construction, city planning, business school, just to name a few of the fields I tried. I did it all for the money, and sank into an ocean of mediocrity. It wasn’t until I stuck with what I loved, writing, that I regained my true power.

What you’ll find, is that just about every field, every talent, has women that want to be with the best. Yes, even videogames. And how can you attract those women if you’re only mediocre?

You want true power? You want the women that come with true power? Do what you love, and become the best at it. What do you gain? Happiness. And the women that come along with it.