Why Looks and Status Matter
Thursday
May 15, 2008
There are numerous ways to learn how to improve your ability to meet and seduce women. We have the forums, we have ebooks, bootcamp programs, and probably most importantly, we have ourselves – going out day after day to meet women, pushing your boundaries, and f*cking things up is the ultimate way to learn game.
But I’ve been learning from other sources too. I’ve learnt a lot from watching TV and film characters: Vince Chase in Entourage, Christian Troy in Nip/Tuck, even Shane (raging lesbian player) in The L Word. Talking with and watching other guys – often, naturals – has also helped me massively. There’s one guy in particular, a work colleague, that has had a phenomenal influence on my game in the last few months, and resulted in me blowing open more sets super-directly than ever before.
The final way that I have been learning game, is by talking to girls about guys they’ve slept with. It’s crazy how much useful information a girl can give you when she says what she likes/dislikes about a guy she’s dating and how he approached her.
It’s with all this information I’ve absorbed in the last 6 months or so that I’ve come to the following conclusions:
Looks are important
Status and wealth are important
Looks
I’m sure a thousand guys will tell me, “Man, you don’t need to be good looking to meet women! Look at me, I’m an ugly f*cker and I pull like a rock star.” But the logical argument here is this: you don’t NEED to be good looking to meet woman, but it sure as hell is gonna help.
I believe one of the issues is that often guys think they are born with their looks and that’s that. Bullshit. It’s a limiting belief, just like the same one that makes you think you can never be good with women, that some guys are born with it and others aren’t.
There are fashion magazines, makeovers, gyms, diets, hair stylists, and plastic surgeons in this wonderful world of ours – it is all there available to help us become better looking people. All we need to do is apply the same commitment and mentality that we do to improving our personalities.
When I was 18, I was seriously insecure about my ears which stuck out from my head. I had plastic surgery to have them pinned back. I realise now that it was a serious milestone in my life and marked the beginning of a journey of self-improvement and becoming the person I wanted to be.
Six years on, I am still working hard on my looks. I’m not a model, but I’ve come a long way from where I was. When I was in school, I hated the way I looked and wished to be as good looking as other boys. Today, I have girls tell me that they like my hair, they love the feel of my arms, and that I look really hot in my coat. It makes all the difference – to my success with women, and to how I feel inside.
I’ve got a hundred examples of where looks have helped guys to get the girl. A girl I’m dating right now showed me a picture of a guy she met on the Tube – the guy is seriously good looking (and actually got picked up by a modelling agency for a shoot). This guy picked her up by doing very little – all he did was establish a bit of eye contact on the platform and she was hooked. She is constantly talking about him saying how hot he is. I don’t blame her, if I was a woman, I would.
I met a lovely girl in Barcelona on the street one afternoon. When I was inside her later that night, she said to me, “When I met you today I thought you were so beautiful.” She then expressed surprised at how old I was and said I was the best dressed 24-year old she had ever met. Finally, she held onto my arms, and said I was a lot bigger than I looked with my clothes on.
I know guys that are ugly, and get laid. I know guys that look like supermodels, and don’t get laid. But, guys that look like supermodels and have player personalities, get laid A LOT.
Status and Wealth
The same logical argument as above applies for status and wealth. You don’t need high status and great wealth to get laid, but it will most definitely help.
Girls delight in telling me (especially the superhot girls) about guys they’ve hooked up with who took them to a VIP lounge in a club, an expensive restaurant, or back to their penthouse apartment in Central London. Girls will gladly talk to and later go home with guys who are decent looking, have good chat, and have been plying them with drinks all night. Now I’m not saying to supplicate and buy a girl drinks in the hopes that if you buy her enough, she will sleep with you. But, if you have a strong personality, high value, and you show a girl that you can do the provider thing, you’re in good stead. I don’t let girls take advantage of me, but if I like them I’ll treat them like I would my mates – that can mean getting a few drinks in.
All other game factors still come into play. I know plenty of guys who are rich and have no game. But again, the guys that are rich and are able to learn some basic game, sleep with seriously hot girls regularly.
This shit is important for all the obvious evolutionary reasons. Girls want a provider, someone who is leader of the tribe, someone with ambition etc. etc. Having great wealth reflects all of that, and that is why you should be working on that area of your life as well.
Summary
It’s true you don’t need to be super good looking or rich to get laid. You can be fat, bald, ugly, poor and unemployed and still get laid. But why make it harder for yourself?
I’m working on all aspects of my life: how I look, how much money I have, and how strong my personality is. It all inter-relates. As a quick example, women are attraction to ambition, which is a part of your personality but reflected by your wealth and status.
My ultimate goal is to be a superstar playboy. I want to be Hugh Heffner. I want to sleep with beautiful women every day, and walk around in a silk robe in the middle of the afternoon. I want to be Vincent Chase and Christian Troy. To get there, I’m gonna need looks, money, and a killer personality.
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